Condolences
by SpeakerOfSilence
Summary: I only wish I could go back and change everything. I wish I could have sacrificed myself for my best friend. Alas, I cannot. So, I will do what I can for Relena, who reminds me of her so much. Rei:Trowa Relena:Heero
1. Prologue

This is a challenged issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge 1'_ in the forum _Peace and War_.

It is written in first person. I can make the pairings how I choose. If you would like to see the entire outline of rules, visit the forum.

My muse, Raiden, shall do the Disclaimer.

Raiden: Fine. -grumbles- Neither I nor Silence own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing. We are borrowing the characters and placing them in a story **Nerf-or-Nothing** gave us the rules for, and we created. We can do what we wish to the plots, characters, and setting, considering this is fanfiction and is in no way associated with the original product.

Silence: Wow. That was more elaborate than usual.

Raiden: What can I say? It's how I roll.

Silence: Don't ever say that again.

* * *

**_Condolences_**

**Prologue**

Sacrifice… that was supposed to be me. I was supposed to be the one to give up everything. My body and spirit were destined for that soul purpose, the willingness to die again and again without complaint or questioning. That was my protocol.

However, fate decided to be cruel again.

My hands are gripping the side of the balcony rail, knuckles turning white with the overwhelming pressure. Ebony hair clung to my face and shoulders, raindrops sliding down my cheeks and between my fingers. Thunder rumbled throughout the sky, penetrating the silent echoes of pain emitting from my heart.

How could she do this to me?

My feet are on the verge of freezing now, numbness flowing throughout them like a virus. Lifting them over the side of the iron bars was easy; balancing myself between the slim ledge and the empty space seemed effortless. In a few moment's, I would be ok. I could see her again.

The rain poured harder now, drenching my already soaked body. The lightening struck fiercely across the sky, its bright light shining down on my shaken body. I began to cry.

If only she wouldn't have saved me, if she would have just let me die. If she would have let me fulfill my purpose as her senshi…

My hands began to loosen up upon these thoughts, her face flashing through my mind. How could she just send me away? Did she expect me to just forget? I live in a world I don't belong in, in a time where I don't need to be… I am powerless.

I hear a few, loud caws behind me. Turning around I see Phobos and Deimos, my guardians. I smile when I see them… they are the only thing I have left of my previous life.

"Lady Rei!" I hear Phobos cry. "Please… stop!"

I shake my head sullenly, my eyes looking down to the drop below.

"Do you want Usagi's sacrifice to be in vain, Lady Rei?" Deimos put's in, instantly nailing a weak spot in my heart.

No, I don't want her sacrifice to be for nothing. I just want to go back and change it… I want to forget it all. I hate living each day knowing that my best friend is dead… and I let her die.

"Lady Rei, please go back inside." Phobos coaxed, landing on my shoulder. "Tomorrow everything will be better."

No it won't. It will never be better.

"Listen to Phobos, Lady Rei… Please go back inside." Deimos landed on my other shoulder. "If not for us, then for Usagi…"

With those words I stepped back over the balcony, my feet landing safely on the other side. I lead my soaked self into my apartment, not turning around once.

I would do anything for Usagi, even though she is no longer with me. But knowing that her death could have been prevented with my life will haunt me forever.

* * *

**End of Prologue**


	2. Chapter One: Zombie

This is a challenged issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge 1'_ in the forum _Peace and War_.

It is written in first person. I can make the pairings how I choose. If you would like to see the entire outline of rules, visit the forum.

My muse, Raiden, shall do the Disclaimer... again. Hehe...

Raiden: DAMMIT! Again? Fine. -grumbles- Neither I nor Silence own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing. We are borrowing the characters and placing them in a story Nerf-or-Nothing gave us the rules for, and we created. We can do what we wish to the plots, characters, and setting, considering this is fanfiction and is in no way associated with the original product.

Silence: Arigato.

_Thank you to..._

_Nerf-or-Nothing (For reviewing and creating the challenge.)_

_Mandamirra10_

_Hnub_

_Boingy_

It is a little longer this time. Stay with me please:) Oh, and if you have pairing suggestions, I am open for them. Rei X anyone male. Same for Relena, but it will probably be Heero anyway. Maybe just a friendship or an implied thing. I don't know. Help.

* * *

**_Condolences_**

**Chapter One: Zombie**

"_They're still fighting… With their tanks, and their bombs,_

_And their bombs, and their guns… In your head, in your head_

_They are dying…"_

"Miss Hino…" The teacher asked aloud, waking me from my day dream… or rather, nightmare. I kept thinking about my home, my old school, my friends… my past life. I don't mean to think about it, but I do anyway.

In honesty, I hate to think about it. I hate remembering what I used to have, what I failed to protect. But, everything I look at, everything I do, reminds me of what I have lost.

"Miss Hino…" The teacher asked again, this time louder. She told me her name, but I didn't care to remember it. "Would you please answer the following question on the board?"

I turned my amethyst eyes, which in this place; receive many odd stares, to the problem. I can hear people snickering and the intense burn of people's eyes on my back, but it does not hurry me, mainly because I have no idea where to begin.

It is so complex. The intricacy of the numbers and the flow of the entire portion until its ultimate end never cease, and I doubt ever will, to amaze me. I just don't understand how a few numbers mixed together with a few squiggly marks can in the end make such a simple answer.

Just like life.

"Miss Hino, I will not ask again."

In response, I sign loudly. "I don't know the answer."

This did not appease the woman.

"Were you not paying attention?"

No, I wasn't actually.

"No."

She walked over to my desk now, putting her palm on the edge and leaning towards me.

"Why not?"

I quirked an eyebrow. Maybe I was too busy thinking about my other life? Maybe it was the friends I had let down? I don't know. So many things…

"I was thinking."

She chuckled a bit. "What could you have been possibly been thinking about? You have amnesia… You don't remember anything prior to a few months ago. You don't even know where you came from."

So you think. I know exactly where I came from and exactly why I had been sent here. I remember everything. I remember the blood running down her face as she looked at me, saying her final farewell and giving luck to my new life. I remember waking up in the rubble of a crumbled building, my body torn to shreds. I remember walking out of the hospital, the doctors staring as I made my way to town with my new ID for this strange place. Oh yes, I do remember everything.

But you don't know that. I couldn't tell you that. You wouldn't understand.

"Believe it or not, I do have a life now."

With a collective gasp from my peers and the scowl etched on my teachers face, I was sure that my school day would be cut to a close.

"You-"

Before she could finish though, an alarm sounded loudly in the school, so loud that it seemed to split my ear drums. I brought myself to look around, with everyone, including my teacher, looking out the window in panic.

Some of the girls in my class had tears rolling down their cheeks, others sat alone in their desk like I am, watching as the guys stare out the windows blankly. They know something is coming.

"Class… Please remain calm…"

An explosion ended her sentence, sending my world into black.

* * *

I woke up some hours later it seemed, my eyelids heavy and heart still beating quickly. What exactly happened anyway? 

I sat up slowly, my vision still blurry. As I turned my head upwards, I felt a trickle of crimson heat run down my face, leaving its stain on my white t-shirt. My hands were shaking as I brought them to my brow, wiping my fingertips into the pool of blood that now resided there. Slipping between my hands, it ran down my nose and beside my eyes in little tributaries, eventually falling onto the ground and my legs below.

Around me I saw broken buildings, the school I once sat in was demolished, the walls caving in around me. Underneath some rubble I spotted a hand covered in blood, the unknown person residing below its deadly weight.

Pushing myself to my feet, I began to climb the wall of debris so I could escape the devastation. I knew that destruction was eminent, the great smoke clouds indicating as much. I could hear sirens and shouts, some people screaming in the distance… it appears that no matter where I go, death follows me.

As I reached the climax of the wall, my eyes finally saw the damage. A few hundred feet away was a crater, everything in its core not so much as existent. The surrounding radius was blown to oblivion, not another soul, save the doctors currently arriving on site, was moving. No one can escape the cold fingers of death.

Except me, of course. A bomb, which so happens to be dropped so close to my location, can't even kill me… I can't even kill myself without being talked out of it. Is it because in my subcouncious I am secretly not ready to die? Or maybe someone is watching over me.

I scan the area again, my eyes trying to see if there was anyone else alive… someone I could help. But, to no avail… there was no one.

I stumble down the hill of rubble, the blood still running down my face. I kept trying to wipe it off, but it just wouldn't stop bleeding. I probably should have just sat still, considering the probability of me having a concussion is very likely. Oh well, too late now.

After I arrive at flat ground, I realize just how much my body hurts. My legs feel as if they have been snapped in two and glued back together, both of them wobbly and unstable. But, I have to keep going. I need to get help. I can't sit by and wait for someone to save me. If I do, they might die… just like Usagi. That is why I would be better dead. Save everyone the liability.

I pass the sides of places that were once buildings, some of there walls still intact. Cars were flipped onto there sides and crumpled to bits, glass glowing on the pavement like a layer of water. I hear it crunching underneath my shoes as I walk, some shards slipping into my shoes as I pass. I can feel some pieces inside of my sock, cutting away at my flesh. My body hurts too much to care.

I glace over to my right for some reason, not really having any indication as to why I did. I just felt compelled too… like something was there. It seemed to be like a shadow, looking over in my direction but only to go unnoticed.

However, there really was something there… or rather, someone.

It took me a moment to realize it, but against a wall was someone sitting down, their knees brought to their chest and hunched over. I couldn't help but be curious as to their welfare, so I slowly made my way across.

As I got closer, I could see long, blonde hair spread like a curtain around the still form, bloody hands protruding from the mass that sat clenched on their knees. A skirt covered the bottoms of the legs, indicating a woman.

"Miss…?" I managed to choke out, my throat dry and raspy. It felt as thought I hadn't talked in years.

She didn't respond, only sat in her silence.

"Miss… are you ok?"

Moments later, the girl lifted her head slowly, eyes wide and scared. Like mine, her face was too covered in crimson blood, whether it is hers or not, I don't know. It coat's her eyes and lips, golden hair stained by hurt.

I crouch down, my knees feeling as though they will explode. But, I can't show weakness now; I have to help this faceless woman.

I touch her hand with my own, offering her one of my rare and weak smiles. I could feel blood swimming down my face even more now, probably mixed with sweat and a few tears.

At my touch, the girl flinched, her eyes growing even wider. She stared at me for a few moments, then a few tears slipped from her eyes, flowing down her blood stained cheeks.

"Are you real?" She whispered, her hand grabbing my own. "You survived?"

I nodded and then stood to my feet, pulling my hand from hers. She looked surprised for a moment, but then I offered her my hand again, wanting to help her to her feet.

The girl hesitated, but then took it, pulling on it and getting to her feet. Her hand trembled, legs struggling to stand. I loop an arm underneath her own, propping my hand on her shoulder. Somehow I can support us both as we trudged toward the sirens.

She coughed a few times, a few tears falling to the ground. She was relatively quiet for the most part.

"Are you alright?" I asked for the third time. My voice soft and as filled with concern as I could make it, unusual for me.

"I can breathe… so I guess I am…"

We walked in silence again… my shoes crunching at the glass and gravel below me.

"I can't believe it is happening again…" She whispered. "We had finally achieved peace…"

Her body was then racked with sobs, making it a little harder for me to carry her. But, it is happening again? This terrible act of terrorism has happened before?

"What do you mean?"

The woman turned her head towards me, her tear ridden face looking bewildered. "Yes… the wars… do you not remember? They ended three years ago."

I kept a solemn face. "I have amnesia. I don't remember."

Her face dropped; eyes and lips twisting in regret. "I am… so sorry…"

"It's ok. You didn't know." I told her, even though the bit about amnesia was a lie. Maybe if I told it long enough, I would begin to believe it myself. "My name is Rei, by the way."

"Vice Foreign Minister Relena Peacecraft."

I quirked an eyebrow, unsure of what to think. This was the girl I had seen on TV so many times during my short time here? What was she doing in this town, wounded?

"How did you get here? If you don't mind me asking…"

She shook her head, eyes straight forward to the horizon. "I was driving to the airport with my bodyguard unit, and then the bomb landed, the car flying to God knows where… I crawled out when I woke up… I couldn't look at their bloody faces anymore…"

I knew she was referring to her bodyguards… I had a similar story back at home.

"Oh… I see."

"MISS PEACECRAFT!"

We turned our heads up to see a few medics, both of them running towards us at top speed. She smiled briefly, but my face held no expression.

I wish they would just let me die.

"Miss Peacecraft… are you alright? We need to get you to the hospital now!" One of them shrieked, taking the girl from my shoulder and into his arms, carrying her up the hill. The other man looked at me, giving a wince.

"You look banged up. We should get you to the hospital too."

He made a move to pick me up, but with a glare and a little shove, he recoiled.

"Don't touch me." I instructed, although it was a little harsh. "I am fine. I just want to go home."

Pushing past him, I trudged up the street some more, looking for my apartment building that hopefully withstood the blast. I could feel the stare of the medic, but I brushed it off, just wanting to get home.

Hell, maybe I'll die before I get there.

* * *

**End Chapter One**


	3. Chapter Two: Angels

This is a challenge issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge 1'_ in the forum _Peace and War_.

It is written in first person. I can make the pairings how I choose. If you would like to see the entire outline of rules, visit the forum.

Raiden: YOU are doing the DISCLAIMER this time.

Silence: Ugh. Fine. I own nothing. Raiden doesn't either. The characters are not mine and will never be mine.

Raiden: Ew. My disclaimer was loads better.

Silence: Then you shall do it again next time.

_Thank you to: __Nerf-or-Nothing, __Mandamirra10, __Lady Light, __Hnub, __Rena H.M., __Firenze, __Cali, __Angel-eyes56, and __PunkeyMonkey3._

It shall be ReiTrowa (unanimous vote.. including myself) and RelenaHeero, although RelenaHeero might just be hints. Romance shall inhance the plot... not be the plot (In words of Mandamirra10).

* * *

**_Condolences_**

**Chapter Two: Angels**

_"I see the angels; I'll lead them to your door_

_There's no escape now, no mercy no more_

_No remorse cause I still remember"_

Unfortunately, I am still here. I successfully made it to my house that day… the day of the bombing.

It has officially been a week since then, and my head has stopped bleeding along with the rest of my wounds. School, as you can imagine, has been canceled for the time being. Not only because the school itself was leveled, but most of the students and staff were blown to pieces… so no point to try starting again soon.

As of right now, I am at work, which brings the memory back even more. When I first arrived here, I woke up in the rubble of a broken building, which was close to the St. Ann's Catholic Church. To make a long story short, I walked over there and talked to the Priest, who then took me to the hospital. I didn't want to offer my entire life story, so I just told them I didn't remember anything, only that my name was Rei Hino. After I was deemed free to go, the Priest met me outside the hospital doors and told me that the church would pay for my housing and school supplies if I would help out in the orphanage.

Me being broke, depressed, and needless to say, helpless… accepted.

"Rei…" Elizabeth, a six-year old orphan, pulled on my t-shirt. "I want some Macaroni."

Out of all the kids I watch over, Elizabeth is undoubtedly my favorite. Her nice, but somewhat mischievous personality got to me I guess… if I wasn't poor, I would probably adopt her myself.

"Alright… do you want to come in the kitchen with me?" I looked down at the brown-haired girl; her blue eyes the size of saucers. "I can teach you the basics of cooking Macaroni."

"Are you allowed too?"

I shrugged, not really knowing. "I don't know."

"I'm in! Jackie will be sooo jealous of me!" Elizabeth rubbed her hands together, smiling evilly at them. "Yes!"

After walking into the kitchen, I grabbed a box of Easy-Mac and dumped it in a pot of boiling water, the little girl beside me fidgeting. Elizabeth wasn't the most patient child, but I guess that is one reason I like her.

She reminds me of myself.

"How much longer? I'm starving!"

That part, however… reminded me of Usagi.

"About two more minutes, then I can mix the rest together. Besides… we have to hurry! Sister Mary won't be very happy if you miss class."

"I don't like class." She huffed, folding her arms. "It makes me sleep."

I stirred the noodles, most of them being squishy. "I think you are having a visitor today…"

"Really?!"

I was surprised at the genuine excitement in her voice, considering she usually tries to hide from everyone, being the little sneak she is.

"Umm… yeah. It is someone who used to go to an orphanage but now is all grown up."

I scooped the cheesy noodles into two bowls, mine containing more than hers. Elizabeth usually claimed near starvation, but never ate once given food. Something I have learned in my two months here.

"Rei… do you have a mom and dad?"

I dropped my spoon in my bowl, not until afterwards realizing I did so. Why did this little girl ask so many questions? Oh well, she is young.

And curious.

"No… I don't."

She looked up from her bowl, a noodle stuck on her upper lip. "So, you are like me?"

"Yep."

Elizabeth began eating again, that one noodle still stuck to her face. I don't know if she realizes, but her being around me makes me at little happy. It actually makes me feel as if I can go another day.

I wonder if it's the fact that I feel needed again.

"Ok, squirt… it's time for you to go to class…" I put down my semi-finished bowl and picked her up, setting her on the ground and taking the remainder of her food. "Don't tell Sister Mary that I brought you in the kitchen."

* * *

The workday finally ended, my eight to six o'clock day coming to a close. Putting on my black sweatshirt and grabbing my purse, I turned to the door, thinking about my apartment… and my bed. 

It was chilly outside. The air still reeked of smoke and the surrounding area still looked very unpleasant to the eye. But, what could one expect after a bombing?

My feet still hurt from the glass that got crammed into my shoes that day. They stopped bleeding, but still hurt. Recognizing the bench I pass by every day, I decide to sit down, my way of transport not feeling so swell.

I turned my head down, resting my chin on my chest and twiddling my thumbs. The world seemed to be slowing down, the wind still and time frozen. Was this how I would be the rest of my life? Alone, depressed, and not looking forward to tomorrow?

Contrary to belief, I really am trying to move on. I'm trying to live in this world, make new friends, be happy… but I can't. It seems as though I will never smile again.

"It is a dreary sight, is it not?"

Startled by the newcomer, I snapped out of my reverie and looked to my right, someone sitting beside me that I recognize to be the girl from the bombing. Her hair was fixed nicely, curled in ringlets that fell down her shoulders, blue eyes set to the horizon. She wore a brown jacket with a pink suit, high heels to match.

What was the Vice Minister doing here?

"I prayed that this wouldn't happen again…" She gave a small smile. "But, fate has other things in store for us, hm?"

I really didn't know what to say to this woman. She just popped out of nowhere, talking about something that I really didn't care to discuss. However, something about her bugged me.

A lot.

"I looked for you as soon as I was able, Rei… I wanted to thank you for what you did."

I quirked an eyebrow.

"I wasn't expecting to live that afternoon. Then you came and rescued me… you saved my life."

So… she was here to say thank you?

"You came all the way here just to tell me thank you?" I gave her an awkward look, not particularly understanding what she was doing. "I don't get it."

She giggled a little and smiled, closing her eyes but turning her head towards me. There was something about her that wouldn't leave me alone.

"Well, you did save my life… something that I would have never gotten another chance in having…"

I sighed. "The thing you cherish most is the thing I would love to lose."

She didn't grow wide eyed and her expression never changed. This surprised me. "You say that, but you don't mean it."

Excuse me? What did she just tell me? Of course I really wanted to die! If I died, then I could be reunited with my senshi, my princess… everything rested at the foot of my demise.

"You can tell yourself you want to die all you want, but when it comes down to it you want to live."

I shook my head, a little irritation getting to me. "You don't understand… You don't know what has happened…"

"According to what you told me a week ago, you don't either." She gave a small smile. "Amnesia?"

Shit. I forgot.

"But, you don't have to tell me the real story. I do know however, that I want to help you." She smiled at me again, this time sending a pain through my heart. "If you need anything, here is my number."

She held out a folded piece of paper, waiting for me to grab it. At first I just stared at it, not believing that this girl would be so kind. Why would she just give me her number like this?

I took it and crammed it into my purse. She didn't stop smiling the entire time.

As Vice Foriegn Minister Peacecraft took her leave, my gaze turned cold, hands clenching in a fit of unknown anger... I finally know why she bugs me so bad.

She reminds me of Usagi.

* * *

"Lady Rei, you should really consider helping her out!" 

"You are the Senshi of War, Lady Rei… I agree with Phobos."

I groaned as I fell onto my bed, rubbing my temples vigorously. They had been going on like this ever since I got home at seven, and now it was nine.

Phobos and Deimos told me that they had been discussing this ever since the bombing. They were convinced that I should help out Relena and everyone else on the war effort, considering that I was previously the Princess of War and Fire.

However, they forgot one tiny detail.

"Phobos… Deimos… I am NOT the Senshi of Mars anymore!" I got a little louder than I intended. Oh well. "My duties as a Senshi died when Usagi died. I don't have to help anyone! Especially Relena!"

Phobos drifted down to the armrest on the couch, Deimos not too far behind.

"I don't understand why you are so bitter to that girl! She offered to help you out! The least you can do is help her!"

"Lady Rei… please forgive me for my impertinence, but I do wonder why you refuse to help." Deimos added in, her opinion voiced a little more politely than her counterpart.

For some reason I couldn't stop getting angry. Every time one of them talked about that stupid Relena, I would just get this feeling that would make me want to punch a hole into something. It's not my fault she is just so… so…

"It's none of your business why I don't like her." I murmured, picking up my jacket again and slipping on my shoes. "I have my reasons and we are going to leave it at that."

I left my apartment in a frazzle, my nerves struck on end and my guardians in a bunch. I don't know where I am going to go, but I just need to get away for a while. I need to get away from everything that reminds me of Usagi.

It wouldn't matter how many times I repeat this to Phobos and Deimos, they wouldn't understand. They will just tell me that Relena and Usagi are two different people and I shouldn't be thinking about that anymore. They are wrong. Usagi and Relena are so much alike to me that I can't even control myself.

Every time they would say Relena, I would automatically start thinking about the way Usagi left me. She left me here, in this stupid place, in a stupid time… all alone. Hell, she wouldn't even let me do my duty as a senshi and die for her. My princess condemned me.

The moon was out, stars glimmering in the night sky. It was truly beautiful, and given under any other circumstances I probably would have stopped to admire them. But, I didn't… I just kept walking.

I pulled my black sweatshirt close around me, crossing my arms as I walked down the less than crowded streets. The wind was chilly, and being alone wasn't at all soothing. So, I turned into an open coffee shop, which had a few stragglers like me inside.

After ordering my coffee and sitting at a window side table, I began to just stare out the glassy pane, my mind wondering in every which direction.

That is, until I got interrupted…

"What a coincidence…" Relena plopped down across from me, setting her cup of coffee down in front of her. "I didn't think I would see you here. You don't seem like the type that would run on coffee."

I shrugged. "What did you think I ran on? Energy drinks and alcohol?"

"Neither. I figured you were more of a 'get-up-and-go' type person."

"I used to be." I sipped my coffee, which I preferably kept black. "What are you doing here? Couldn't you get coffee at your house? Lord knows you have enough money."

She smiled warmly, still not taking a drink of her beverage, only holding it between her hands. "I can. But, I like the outside world sometimes. Besides, my bodyguards need a break." The last of her sentence contained a bit of a laugh.

I looked behind her a little to see two men, both brunettes. One had short brown hair and kept his eyes on Relena the entire time, only tearing his gaze for small moment's at a time. He obviously didn't like her sitting here with me.

The other one however, looked like he didn't have a care in the world, long braid draped over his shoulder as he chatted idly with a lady customer… kind of reminded me of Minako.

"Listen… I am having a banquet in honor of everyone involved in the war effort. I don't know how much of a pacifist you are, but I would still like you to come." She reached into her pocket and handed me an envelope, an elaborate seal on the back. "It is a formal occasion, so if you do come, you need to dress appropriate. If you need anything, you have my number."

Before I could say anything, she smiled and walked away, her two bodyguards following faithfully behind her. Although one did take his leave a little slower than the other, considering he was saying goodbye to a new lady acquaintance.

I looked to the envelope again and then turned up towards her coffee cup. It was still full.

For some reason, I have the feeling she didn't come here for coffee.

* * *

**End Chapter Two**


	4. Chapter Three: Valparaiso

It is written in first person. I can make the pairings how I choose. If you would like to see the entire outline of rules, visit the forum.

Silence: You know the routine, Raiden. Get with it!

Raiden: Ugh. I hate you.

Silence: Ok.

Raiden: Neither I nor Silence own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing. We are borrowing the characters and placing them in a story Nerf-or-Nothing gave us the rules for, and we created. We can do what we wish to the plots, characters, and setting, considering this is fanfiction and is in no way associated with the original product. -There! Happy!?!

Silence: Indeed

_Thank you to: Nerf-or-Nothing, Lady Light, Mandamirra10, Firenze, Angel-eyes56, Cali, Rena H.M., Perfection's Scream, and Firnoviel._

Ok, so in this chapter, more of Rei's spark shall return. Of course, I will not have it all return at once, because that would be completely unrealistic and not cool. So, enjoy.

* * *

_**Condolences**_

**Chapter Three: Valparaiso**

_"If I should die,_

_And water's my grave,_

_She'll never know if I'm damned or I'm saved."_

It was currently nap-time at the orphanage; all the younger children were fast asleep, bundled up and passed out on the couch, floor, shelves… whatever they deemed bed-worthy. Drool slid out of their mouths and arms hung limp. A typical day.

The older children were hanging out upstairs, their loud footsteps resonating on the ceiling above me. I shake my head as I read my magazine, the rowdiness reminding of my once hectic life.

A college ad sticks out in my reading material, an ornate slogan and seal in the middle of the paper. At home, I had always wanted to attend a University along with becoming a Priestess. Even if it was just an Associate's degree, I wanted something in case things turned for worse.

Now all hopes of being a Priestess and going to college were out of the question...

"Rei…" Sister Mary called from the foyer, sticking her head into the 'living area', so to speak. "You have a phone call."

A what?

"Excuse me?"

She gave me an irritated look, her eyebrows furrowing together and lips going into a thin line.

"I said, you have a phone call." She placed the phone on the wooden stand and marched off, muttering something about 'kids these days'.

I would have gone after that nun to inform her that I was not a child. I am eighteen years old for the love of Pete. Just because I'm not one-hundred doesn't make me a kid!

However, I am far too shocked about the phone call to go after her… my phone call.

Who in God's name would be calling me? I don't know anyone besides the people here at the orphanage. I picked up the phone and placed it to my ear, curiosity getting to me.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Rei!" Relena quirked, a slight pep to her voice. I roll my eyes at myself for not thinking of it sooner. "Are you coming to my banquet tomorrow?"

"Er, no." I replied flatly. I wasn't meaning to be rude, but I have a feeling that I came across that way.

"Oh, why not? I was really hoping you would come!"

"Well," I began, drawling out the 'l' a bit. It was so hard being mean to this girl, even though she obviously can't take a hint. However, I just can't say no. Maybe it is because this is what Usagi used to do to me. "I don't have clothes or the money to buy any. I have to work…"

"No you don't! I already talked to Father Gregory and he said he would let you skip tomorrow!" My jaw dropped. She went to all this trouble? "And I will give you some money for a dress! Like you said before, 'It's not like I don't have enough' anyway."

That was indeed an undisputable fact.

"Rei, I know you probably think I'm a crazy lunatic, but I told you I am going to help you, so that is what I am going to do!" She huffed into the phone. "Two of my bodyguards will be there in an hour to take you to the woman who takes care of my dresses. She will help you out. See you tomorrow!"

With that she hung up on her end, leaving me completely and utterly speechless.

* * *

An hour rolled by in what seemed like days, my mind still completely boggled. Why is it that the person I would like to all together avoid keep coming after me? Why is my luck so terrible?

I tug at my t-shirt and frown, my brain tired of going through the reasons. Maybe I should just stop being an asshole and give her a chance. After I did that with Usagi my life was a lot less strenuous.

But I think that is the reason I am trying to stay away from Relena. She is too much like _her_.

Dropping my head onto the reception desk with a thud, I exhale and make a grumbling noise, frustration creeping into my senses. Why couldn't I just be happy?

"Excuse me, miss?"

I raise my eyes to see two men standing before me, one of them an extremely tall brunette and the other a short blonde. After a moment I realize that the blonde one was the person whom addressed me.

"Are you alright?"

I stand from my spot and smooth my shirt. "I am ok. Just suffering from a session of self-pity. How may I help you?"

The blonde gave me a questionable look while the other just stood there, his face void of any emotion. Were these Relena's bodyguards?

"My name is Quatre Winner and his name is Trowa Barton, we are two of Relena's bodyguards. I trust she informed you of our visit?" After my brief nod he offered his arm and smiled. "Alright, well then let's be off!"

This Quatre fellow spoke extremely proper and had impeccable manners… he had to be rich. Don't ask me how I know… I just do; and I am never wrong.

"Ok…" I took his arm and let him lead me out of the double doors.

The walk to the car, which also could be referred to as the limo, was quick, considering they parked on the curb outside the Church entrance. I went in first, sitting on the right side while Trowa and Quatre sat themselves in front of me from the opposing bench seat.

I cannot even begin to explain the awkwardness behind this event. Here I was in my dirty, black converse, ripped jeans, purple t-shirt, and a black sweater, sitting in this luxurious limo with two well-dressed and refined men. Definitely not something I pictured myself doing at any point in my life.

"So, Miss Hino… Or is it Mrs.?" The blonde asked, his blue eyes twinkling in the light let in by the window.

"N-no! Definitely Miss!" I laugh nervously, shaking my hands in front on me to insinuate the fact I was not married. I barely had an intention of getting married in my old life, so any possibility of me getting married at all were long gone with my aspirations of college and being a priestess.

"Oh, alright." He gave a kind smile, which in a way reminded me of Ami. Quatre carried this air about him that just reeked of goodness… both in personality and intellect. I don't think he has a bad bone in his body. "Do you enjoy working at the orphanage?"

I nod feverishly at this question. "I love working there. I couldn't ask for a better job." This in all honesty was true… I wouldn't pick anywhere else to work. "The kids made my life worth living; especially Elizabeth."

"Our friend used to live at an orphanage before the wars started." He continued on the subject. "He talks about it a lot… really looked up to Father Maxwell."

I look down to my clasped hands, my hair falling by my face. At least Quatre was talking and trying to make it less awkward. But, the other one, Trowa, wouldn't say anything. He just sits there and watches us have a conversation. Is he a mute?

"Anyhow…" Quatre looked out of his window. "We are about to pull up to the store."

I inwardly groan, not exactly liking this situation. I know that this woman will probably be rude and scorn my apparel, considering I am not dressed to par.

"Are you ok, Miss Hino?"

I nod my head wearily. "Yes… I just dread going to do this."

The two men climb out of the car first, Quatre offering his hand to me while I step out. My face has to be showing complete horror… I know it has to be.

Trowa opened the door and Quatre stepped in with me behind him, the brunette filing in behind me. Upon my entrance, my eyes grew wide, the number of fancy gowns enough to clothe a third-world country.

"I assume that you are my project for today?"

We all turn to see a pudgy woman, donning a pastel-green dress and brown heels, hair done in a bun and brown eyes caked in make-up. The aura about her was enough to make me vomit… the sense of superiority she believed herself to possess making me cringe.

"Madame Hall, this is Rei Hino. She needs a dress for the banquet tomorrow." Quatre smiled his friendly grin. "Relena was sure you could make something happen."

Madame Hall turned her attention to me now. "You do realize that everything in the story is fairly high-price?"

My jaw dropped. This woman was terribly rude.

I want to hit her.

"Relena has this taken care of. Just find a dress." Quatre obviously sensed my anger. "Please."

With a huff she beckoned us forward to a desk, shoving me into it forcefully. "Now, I want you to decide a color and style of the dress." She raised an eyebrow as she pointed to a catalog. "As in do you want it to be strapless, halter, ect."

The repulsive woman directed her attention back to Quatre. "You need to come with me to finalize the terms of payment."

As soon as she disappeared into her office, shutting the wooden door behind her, my head makes contact with the catalog.

"Ugh! I can't believe that awful woman!"

Lifting my sore head, that seems to be finding itself on hard surfaces as of late, I turn my attention to the stoic Trowa, who just looked at me in curiosity. His green eyes twinkled with a calm glow, broad shoulders rolled back with his arms crossed.

If he wasn't so damn quiet, he might be cute.

Maybe…

"Do you ever speak?" I question, him giving me a surprised look in return. "I am usually pretty quiet, but I think you have me beat."

Trowa shrugged. "I am just more of a listener I suppose."

I turn my attention back to the catalog, looking at the frilly dresses and elaborate shoes. Kind of reminds me of what I wore in the Silver Millennium.

But, we aren't in the Silver Millennium anymore, are we?

"I can't believe Relena wants me to go so bad as to pay for my dress." I mumble to myself as I flip the page. "Reminds of when Usagi-"

I instantly shut my mouth.

I know Trowa is looking at me right now, but I can't help it. Just speaking her name hurts… throbs in my chest. I can't begin to explain the unbearable pain it emits… just saying her name…

Usagi.

"Is your first formal gathering, Miss Hino?"

My gaze is still glued to the page, my chest still aching. "I guess you could say that."

I hear him make an 'hmmm' sound as I continue to observe the different styles of tops. I believe I am leaning more towards a halter.

"I hope I don't stick out too bad. I don't want to be an embarrassment."

For some reason, this got that quiet mans attention.

"I don't know what to do, how to act… I won't know any of these people." I make a loud huff. "I don't know why she wants me to go so bad."

There was a brief silence… kind of awkward, just like the car ride.

"She really wants to help you." He leaned against the wall. "Relena talks about you non-stop. She believes that you two have a chance at becoming friends."

I look at Trowa in awe, not really knowing what to say. It kind of made me feel bad for being so mean to Relena in the past.

"She tells us that she doesn't know what happened to you in the past, but she vowed to make you at least a little happier." He looked me in the eye. "It made Heero really proud, and Heero rarely speaks like that to anyone."

About that time, Quatre and that stupid woman returned, the former looking as though he had been to hell and back. Deciding that I needed to step up to the plate and be more reasonable, I give a smile.

"I have decided for my stuff, but I have a question for you Quatre."

The blonde looked surprised at my sudden urge to be more helpful and putting in an effort. I just couldn't help myself after what Trowa told me. He urged me to continue.

"I was wondering if it would be ok if Elizabeth came along. She really wants to go… and after I told her I was invited, she got so happy." I fold my hands and look to the ground. "I was just curious."

"I know that Relena won't mind. She loves kids."

I was mid-smile when Madame Hall marched up towards me, jerking my left hand from my right. Thrusting it to her eyelevel, she frowned, throwing it down in disgust.

"You aren't even married! I cannot believe this!" She huffed and crossed her arms. "I had my doubts when I first saw you, and now they have been confirmed!"

"Wait a second lady!" I stepped right back into her face, my index finger pointing between her eyes. For a moment I feel shocked, knowing that a bit of my spark has returned, but that will have to wait. I am too mad right now.

"Elizabeth is not my child! She is an orphan I take care of at the orphanage! If you would kindly shut your face and stop judging me, then maybe we can proceed on like adults!" I look to the catalog, pointing to a picture. "I want a red, haltered dress. For Elizabeth, I want something cute for a six-year old. Can you do that?"

She looked enraged at my comeback, but also little embarrassed for her assumption. Running to a rack of dresses she pulled out a few, coming back with my options.

It was good to see that at least a part of me was coming back.

* * *

**End Chapter Three**


	5. Chapter Four: Fallen Leaves

This is a challenge issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge'_ in the forum _Peace and War_.

I am trying to get my updates out faster. Honest.

While I am at it, I am going to advertise for the forum _Peace and War_, because it is an awesome forum with amazing challenges. I really do encourage you to go visit it and take on some challenges, especially the Rei Challenge... I want to see a different take on it other than my own.

Also, I am looking towards writing a YuGiOh fic w/ Rei as a primary focus. Not the 'centered character' persay, but a main point. Any idea's? Challenges? My creative juices are flowing here lately.

I am about to update 'We Who are Cursed' as well, so look out for that. Thank you to those who have been patient.

_Thank you to: Nerf-or-Nothing, Lady Light, Rena H.M. Mandamirra10, firenze, firnoviel, and angel-eyes56._

Silence: Raiden is sleeping, so I shall do the Disclaimer.

I do not own anything and the idea for this fic is based off a challenge issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing**. Get it? Got it? Good.

Let's proceed.

* * *

_**Condolences**_

**Chapter Four: Fallen Leaves**

_"In this crooked little town they were lost and never found_

_Fallen leaves, fallen leaves, fallen leaves_

_On the ground"_

It is the day of the banquet… hooray.

Can't you sense my excitement?

I pull at my dress a little more, making sure it isn't twisted and the like. Even though that woman was extremely detestable, she did do a good job on the dresses. After I gave her a dress size, she just picked one out and made alterations, adding a few personal touches of my own to it.

The entire gown was black, the sheen of the fabric catching my eye as soon as she pulled it from the shelf. It had a slit from the mid-calf down on the right side; the halter was cute and made the dress more modest. Madame Hall even gave me a pair of heels free of charge.

Probably because she was so rude to me… wouldn't doubt it.

I pulled my hair up with two black chopsticks, and when I say chopsticks, I mean I stole them from the Japanese restaurant down the road. I figured they would work nicely enough. My bangs hung in my face, two strands of hair hung at the sides of my head. It was elegant enough.

"Rei, are you going to do my make-up and I will do yours?" Elizabeth asked while she sat on the edge of my king-sized bed, feet dangling off the side. She proudly flaunted her dress, smoothing its frilly pink skirts down and rubbing her leggings. "It will be fun!"

"Well, honey…" I am applying my mascara while having this conversation, mind you. "You are a little to young to be wearing makeup."

"Aw, fudge."

I smile at her and sit beside her, beginning to curl the ends of her hair with a curling iron. "The time for you to wear makeup will come soon enough. Why do you want to wear makeup anyway?"

"I want the boys to think I'm pretty."

I quirk an eyebrow. "You are too young to look at boys, also. Besides, if it is a nice boy, he will like you with or without makeup."

"I guess there aren't very many nice boys then."

I continue to curl her hair, the brown ringlets falling to her shoulders. "Why do you say that?"

She turned her head downward and looked at her skirt. "Because if there were nice boys, you would have a boyfriend. You don't wear makeup, and you look beautiful."

My mouth fell open in shock.

"I hope that when I am older, I can be just like you."

For some reason, I couldn't handle it. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't find it in my heart to say 'no, you don't want that', because the thought of taking away anything this child wants breaks my heart. So, I just pick her up and head down to the lobby of my complex, not so much a word being shared between us.

* * *

The beginning of the banquet was relatively boring, consisting of Relena introducing her five bodyguards, whom all used to be pilots of these things called Gundams, four of which I recognized, and her thanking everyone for attending. Even though I was bored out of my mind, Elizabeth was enjoying herself thoroughly. She loved showing off her dress.

"Rei, do you think a boy will dance with me?"

I snap out of my day dreams of nothing and look to the girl, my arms getting chilly from the lack of coverage.

"I'm sure. If they don't, they are stupid."

Elizabeth smiled brightly at this one. I couldn't help but smile in return, the small child unable to make me sad.

"Alright everyone… allow me to introduce the orchestra tonight…"

Relena didn't even have time to finish before Elizabeth tapped me on the arm.

"Is it time?"

I nod my head as an affirmative. "But, you have to wait for the guy to ask you."

Her face displayed a look of great puzzlement. Soon afterward though, she just shook her head and rolled her eyes.

"Well, I can't wait that long. I am going to ask that boy over there." She indicated the direction with her finger. "Maybe he will be a nice boy! Then, all you have to do is find a nice boy, too!"

She sped off into the direction of the boy, my watchful eye on her at all times. I am afraid that the child shall grow up to be a flirt.

Only time will tell.

"Rei! I am so happy you came!" Relena ran up towards me, a smile beaming on her features.

Well, you kind of made me come.

"Yeah, I am glad I could come. Elizabeth is having a blast." I lied… partially. Elizabeth really was having a wonderful time.

"Alright!" She smoothed the front of her pink, strapless dress. "Well, don't hesitate to go dance!"

Ugh. Let me just jump out there real quick.

"I'm alright. Thank you though."

She cocked her head to one side and smiled. "Ok! Well, Heero and I will dance by Elizabeth so you can go mingle. I will keep an eye out until you return."

With that Relena and Heero walked away, leaving me alone again.

My eyes look at Elizabeth once more, who is chatting away happily with her new friend. I am glad at least someone is having fun at this… thing.

I see that Quatre fellow from yesterday across the dance floor, holding a glass of champagne and talking business with five other men in tuxedos. His blonde hair was neatly combed, but still held the aura of casualness. He seemed happy where he was.

Against the far wall Trowa stood, leaning against it with a sense of boredom. He seems almost as miserable as I am. Ever since the first moment I talked to him, he intrigued me. I don't really know why, but he did. Maybe it was because he actually listened; unlike most of the guys I know who talk out of their asses.

Tired of being bored and lonely and trusting Relena with watching Elizabeth for a moment, I sat from my seat and made my way over to Trowa, boredom etched all over his face.

"Don't look so happy…" I walked over beside him, arms crossed as I leaned against the wall along with him. "You might cause everyone else to feel the excitement."

He turned his head and looked at me, then turned back towards the crowd. He didn't look appeased at all.

"I just don't like coming to these things."

I nod my head. "Agreed."

We stood there for another moment in complete silence. Conversing with a listener is very difficult.

"Where is Elizabeth?"

I snap out of my reverie with his question.

"She is dancing with some boy. Relena and Heero are watching her."

The music that the orchestra played slowed down to a steady piano ensemble, everyone's dancing slowing to a glide. I see that man, the braided one from the coffe parlor, dancing with a woman. He has to be as bad as Minako was.

"Would you like to dance?"

Um… excuse me? What was that?

I couldn't help but be surprised, but I also couldn't help but smile. This man was so different than all the others I had come across, so maybe, just maybe, he could be different.

Maybe.

"Yes, that sounds wonderful."

I took his arm as he led us to the dance floor, melting into the crowd of the rich and famous. Taking my right hand in his left and my waist in the other, we began to sway to the smooth rhythm of the piano, the world seeming like a dream.

I never pictured myself to be in a place like this, even when we would see glimpses of Crystal Tokyo. I couldn't even begin to fathom what it would feel like. Now it appears that I have, although in different circumstances. In that moment I was with my friends… now, I am with a man I barely know.

He seemed very relaxed to be where he was, like he had been doing it for a while. But, then again he was a 'Gundam pilot' or whatever Relena had recognized him for being. He probably had to come to these things all the time.

Poor Trowa.

"I'm sorry I am such a poor dancer." I couldn't keep it in any longer. I am sure my lack of dancing skills were grating on his nerves as they were severely grating on mine.

"It is ok. You aren't too bad." He still didn't smile. "I have been doing this for a while."

I nod my head. "How long did were you a Gundam Pilot? Or are you still one?"

He seemed to be more relaxed now that we were discussing something more in his realm of interest, since I doubt dancing is included.

"I started when I was around fifteen years old up until two years ago, so about four."

So, Mr. Barton was twenty-one, legal drinking age back at home. Actually, I wonder what the drinking age is here. Note to self: ask someone.

"But, it appears that I will be heading back into that soon with all the fighting starting back up again from the wars."

Here was someone else talking about the 'wars'. They seemed pretty recent, but happened before I got here. I feel dumb when people start conversations about them, so I will stick to my amnesia story.

"Is that why you never smile, Mr. Barton?" I had to sneak that in somewhere. It was continuing to bug me to no extent.

He shrugged as we continued to sway across the dance floor, the harp in the orchestra stealing a solo.

"I just think that nowadays smiles are handed out too freely. I believe that if you smile too much then nothing will seem special, so they are only given from me on very special occasions."

It took all I could do to not just stare at him. What he said made perfect sense, but it seemed wrong at the same time. It took all I had to smile since the day… she… died, but I try to do it as much as I can to move on.

Was it bad that I continued to smile, when my closest friends were dead?

Before I could reply to anything Trowa had said previously, the orchestra stopped playing and everyone gave them a soft round of applause, watching as Relena walked up the stage.

She took the microphone and gave the crowd a dazzling smile, blonde ringlets falling beside her face. She was just like her… able to captivate a ground with a single breath.

I really hate how they are so alike.

"Again, I would really like to thank everyone for coming. However, there is someone I would like to thank in particular. Would Miss Rei Hino come up here please?"

My mouth fell open. I thought about running away quickly, but she saw me… and it was too late.

I found myself walking up the stairs to the stage, feeling the heat of one-thousand eyes on my form. Still, I held my head high and didn't show that my nerves were about to make me do something rash.

"Miss Hino here has become a good friend of mine. On the day of the most recent bombing, this young woman saved my life. Without her, I would probably not be standing before you today." She stopped talking so everyone could clap. "Now…"

She continued to ramble on and I spaced out for a moment, trying to figure out where Elizabeth went. I saw her and smiled her little hand waving at me from her spot by the boy, Heero a few feet back.

However, I looked up towards the windows and see the moonlight, its warmth bathing me in serenity. The moon… reminds me of so many things.

But, I saw something else.

In the center window, I could make out a silhouette, of what I don't know. I squint my eyes a little to get a better picture, but to no avail, receive anything.

Other than a splitting headache… followed by something I haven't had in a while. A vision.

I see a bullet fly through the window, moving in slow motion towards Relena's chest. Before I could see the end result, a shot sounded, the sound of broken glass and a screaming crowd breaking my train of thought.

"Watch out!"

* * *

I can't exactly explain what happened then, because I don't really understand it myself. One minute I was having a vision of Relena getting shot, the next it happened, and instead of Relena getting shot it was me.

That about sums it up I guess.

I still can't see very well, but I can hear the voices all around me, everyone screaming.

"Rei!" Relena calls dragging me behind the stage and lifting up my head. "Oh my God! Oh my God! I need to get you medical attention!"

I shook my head wearily and lifted a hand, wiping my eyes of the muck, which I soon realized was blood.

"Stay here until you have protection. It isn't safe for you to go out in the open yet." I murmured. "That bullet was meant for you. Whoever shot it won't be easily foiled."

Through the blurry specks in my eyes I could see her face twisted in grief. Something about her sadness me sad. I couldn't place it, but it made me uneasy.

Maybe it was the fact I had a bullet lodged in my shoulder and a probable concussion from my face fault to the floor. Hmmm… maybe that was what it was.

"Relena!"

I turn to see Heero, his features looking a mixture between relief and panic. I couldn't help but notice how his eyes lit up upon seeing my new blonde friend- er, acquaintance, safe.

"Ok, as much as I love this touching moment, I would really like to know where Elizabeth is and I want this damn bullet out of my shoulder!" I finally screech out, ignoring the shocked looks I receive.

"Miss Peacecraft!"

I look to where Heero stands, Quatre and a new face appearing by his side. The other man was Chinese, black hair slicked back into a neat ponytail at the nape of his neck. He seemed angry.

"Who is this stupid woman?" He asked, sending me a glare.

Wrong move, bucko.

"Stupid woman?! I will have you know-" The wound in my shoulder suddenly becomes more apparent, the recent shock wearing off I assume. "AH! Someone get me a doctor! I want Elizabeth!"

No one moves.

"How come whenever misfortune falls upon Relena, you are always involved, woman?" He sneered at me, making my insides flare. "How did you know that an assassination attempt was in progress?"

Ok, I am about to bust my top. I am lying on tile, blood is running down my face and a bullet is stuck in my shoulder blade. Elizabeth is not in here and I am about to throttle this stupid, Chinese man.

"It is kind of suspicious…" Heero mutters to himself beneath his breath, but I hear him.

"Ok, I know it's weird, but I will talk to you about it later! I am bleeding from SAVING Relena, and Elizabeth is missing!" I try to push myself up, but am shoved down by the Chinese mans foot.

"You aren't going anywhere just yet, woman."

* * *

**End Chapter Four**

Remember... humor me with idea's for a YGO story. : )


	6. Chapter Five: Sorry

This is a challenge issued by** Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge-1'_ in the forum _Peace and War._

Silence: So, here is the next installment. I would like to keep advertising for **Nerf-or-Nothing's** forum. It rocks, so you should visit it. Ok?

Raiden: I will visit it!

Silence: Shut up. We have already visited it a lot. I was talking to those who haven't yet.

Raiden: Oh, ok! Disclaimer?

Silence: Um, hm.

Raiden: We own nothing! Don't steal the plot line, or Silence, Nerf-chan, and I shall find you and chop your hands off!

Thank you to:** Nerf-or-Nothing, Lady Light, Mandamirra10, firnoviel, Rena H.M., minnieshon, Firenze, Angel-eyes56, Toowhiteprincess**, and **Darkbadkitty** for reviewing! I love you guys!

Thank you also to those who submitted idea's for the YuGiOh fic. I am currently working on it!

Onward!

* * *

**_Condolences_**

**Chapter Five: Sorry**

_"This time I think I'm to blame  
It's harder to get through the days  
We get older and blame turns to shame."_

Now I am lying in a hospital bed, my head groggy and body limp. I swear the doctor's gave me enough drugs to sustain a country suffering through an epidemic.

My nose is stuffy, maybe it is because there is a plastic tube crammed up my nostrils. It is getting on my nerves. But, when I tried to yank it out the doctors got mad, saying that the gunshot put me into shock and something else about my lungs… I don't know.

However, I do know that I am still majorly pissed off at Wufei, the name of the Chinese man who kicked me down, who kept me from getting to Elizabeth sooner because of his thirty minute interrogation and calling me 'woman' between every other derogative phrase.

Asshole.

Anyway, Trowa came on the stage, Elizabeth in tow, minutes after Wufei's brutal kick to my chest. Despite the pain and anger I felt coursing throughout my entire body, I couldn't help but look at Elizabeth with a smile, my nerves easing knowing that she was safe.

My eyes looked up to Trowa, his face still void of anything. He had his hands on Elizabeth's shoulders, offering all the comfort he knew how to give. She stood before me, small hands covering her mouth and eyes beginning to water.

"Elizabeth, don't cry." I smiled. "Big girls don't cry."

She choked back her tears and nodded solemnly, looking to the ground in sadness. I knew she was desperately trying to do as I asked.

"I am going to ask you one more time! Who are you?" Wufei demanded, burning holes through my face with his glares. His screaming made me very upset, wanting to snap his neck at his next remark.

But, before I was supposed to answer, a doctor came to my rescue, landing me here.

Staring at the white ceiling and walls, I feel as though I am going insane. Why am I still alive? Why can't I die? This is the third instance in which I should have kicked the bucket, yet, I just can't.

Is there someone watching over me? There has to be. If I was anyone else, under any other circumstance, I would have died long ago.

"Miss Rei Hino?" A nurse stuck her head in my room, receiving a raised eyebrow in return. She was a chubby little thing, wearing blue scrubs and a little cookie crumb on her face. "You have some visitors."

Oh, really? I will give you three guesses on who it is… but you will only need one.

"Rei?"

Oh, yes, I was correct.

Relena walked to my bedside, sitting in the chair on my right. Her face looked remorseful, blue eyes not glistening and sunny as they usually were, but rather, full of tears and dull.

"Yeah?"

She grabbed my hand and squeezed it, turning her head to the floor, hiding her eyes from my own.

"I'm so sorry…" I saw a drop of water fall from her face. "I'm so sorry! It's my fault that this happened to you!"

I watch her sob with wide eyes, shocked to see her so upset over something she couldn't even control. It wasn't her fault at all that I just happened to get a vision, which mind you, hasn't happened since I was tossed into this world.

It was a mere coincidence that she had absolutely no control over.

"Relena…"

"No! It was my fault! I made you come to the banquet!" She was crying heavily now, making me rather uncomfortable. I don't really now how to handle crying people. The only person I could really understand was Usagi, and when she cried I would yell at her or smack her on the back of the head. Being 'comforting' is not my area of expertise.

"Relena… listen…" I closed my eyes and sighed before I began. "You had no way of knowing that this would happen. It was all just a big pile of crap."

She looked up and smiled briefly, tears still rolling down her face. It looked as if she was going to say something, but before she could, the door burst open, revealing a person I would like to never see again.

"Wufei? Heero?" Relena asked as she looked to the two newcomers to the room, one with a face of distrust and the other one of indifference. "I thought I said to wait in the hallway."

"Well, I didn't feel like waiting any longer. I want this girl to start spitting out answers!"

Inside I felt my blood boiling, my uncontrollable temper trying to get the best of me. But, I can't lose control. I need to stay calm.

That's it… stay calm.

"I have no answers to offer you." I state blandly. Wufei did not seem pleased in the slightest.

"I don't believe you!" He slammed his hand down on the nearby metal counter. "You somehow knew that an assassination was planned, and I will find out why."

Relena pressed her back firmly on the back of the chair, looking to her folded hands that resided in her lap.

"Wufei, please stop…"

"No, Miss Peacecraft, I will not stop! You life was at risk and she somehow knew about it!"

Relena then did something I never thought I would see her do.

She slammed her feet to the ground and stood up quickly, throwing back her chair loudly as she turned around, fists shaking in anger. If looks alone could kill someone, Wufei would have died just moments ago.

"You're right, Wufei! Rei did know somehow that someone was trying to kill me! But, you know what else? She saved me!" The boys were obviously shocked by this behavior as well, considering that they looked stunned. "I know that it might be considered suspicious, but if she saved me, she can't be all that bad."

It felt like a rock was hurled through my stomach.

"She will tell us how she knew and about her past eventually." She smiled at me and then turned her back. "Rei will tell us when she is ready."

I guess my amnesia story will now be ineffective to all parties involved. I shouldn't have opened my big mouth the day we talked on the bench.

* * *

I just woke up from a three hour nap, my joints feeling crammed and my back aching. It was cloudy outside, or that was how it appeared from my window. Maybe it would rain.

I heard the door open slowly, looking to it I saw the nurse with her clipboard, a smile on her face.

"Miss Hino, you have some visitors." She cleared her throat. "If you are still trying to rest, I will tell them to wait a little longer."

I close my eyes and rub my forehead. It was then I noticed that plastic nose tube was gone.

"If it is a Chinese man, tell him to go away and never come back."

She gave me a puzzled look.

"Well, I don't think he is Chinese, but I can't be sure. He has brown hair... There is a little girl too…"

I about jumped off the bed.

"Send them in."

The lady looked like I startled her and bolted off, closing the door behind her. I tend to have a very intimidating demeanor, but I couldn't help it. I am thrilled that Elizabeth came.

And maybe Trowa, too.

"Rei!" Elizabeth burst through the door and ran to the bedside, standing on her tip toes to hug me from the side of the bed. Her pink jacket bounced up and down as she ran, black dress shoes hitting the floor. "Rei, I am so happy you are ok!"

I hug her back warmly, squeezing her with my weak arms.

"I am glad you are ok." I push her away a little so I can look at her face, her eyes brimmed with water.

"Have you been good?"

She shook her head up and down quickly, signifying an affirmative on her part. "Oh, I have something to tell you! Lean closer… it's a secret…"

Doing as instructed, I picked myself up on my elbows and leaned closer to her face, the small child still on her toes.

"I found a nice boy for you."

She smiled mischievously and her eyes glinted, shaking her head slightly towards Trowa.

"He is a very nice boy. He came over this morning and asked Sister Mary if he could take me to come see you." She grinned while she told her story, still whispering in my ear. "And GUESS WHAT?"

I quirked an eyebrow. "What?"

"He is taking me to get ice cream!" Elizabeth began to clap her hands excitedly and then she slid off the bed. "Ok, Trowa… I am done telling Rei my secret so you can come over here."

I looked over to the corner and saw him, making his way over here slowly. He was wearing blue jeans and a green turtleneck, a brown jacket sitting in the chair he once sat in. I guess the cold was really starting to kick it up a notch.

"Hello, Trowa." I gave him a small smile, knowing I wouldn't receive one in return. "It was nice of you to bring Elizabeth here."

"Anytime." His face held an impassive look, but I could tell he was taking everything in. His eyes darted around the room, observing the crevasses of the shelves to the specks on the window.

He was indeed very observant.

"I heard that you got some other visitors' today." He watched Elizabeth walk to the chair he was sitting in moments ago and take a seat, pulling a child's magazine from the stand beside it. "And some of them were not so pleasant."

I grimaced. "You could say that again. I hate that Wufei guy. He's the biggest asshole I have ever met."

"Your are not the first to have said that."

I figured as much. The entire time he was here, even after Relena's bold statement, all he did was complain and barge me with questions I had no intention on answering. Then he took to calling me 'woman' again, which also made me angry.

However, since I am strapped to this stupid bed in this stupid hospital, I couldn't teach that stupid man a lesson.

Ugh, life is cruel.

"Thank you…" I whispered a few moments later, not until afterward realizing that I had said it. Where did that come from? Maybe it was stored back in the caves of my mind until I planned on saying it, which appeared to have been three seconds ago.

"Um, what for?"

I guess since I let the cat out of the bag, I should just finish what I started.

"You know, for protecting Elizabeth at the banquet… and hanging out with her now that I am here…" I looked to my folded hands. "I just don't know what I would have done if something would have happened to that child…"

I looked up and watched the small girl flip through her book, a puzzling look scribbled on her features.

"I know she isn't my real child, but she feels like it. She is the only thing I have that is keeping me alive…" I looked up to his face, which neither held a look of shook or grief. "So, thank you… so much."

It was then I could have sworn I saw him smile for a brief moment, flashing a small grin then hiding it again behind his exterior. Then again, maybe it was nothing at all and my imagination was playing tricks on me.

But, I do know that one day, I will see this guy smile, one that I will know for sure is real.

* * *

I am back at my apartment again, my arm in a sling-thing and my face sans makeup, not that I wear much anyway. But, considering that I have been hospitalized the past few days, I need it.

The Priest at the Church excused me from work for the time being, saying that I need rest after my 'noble deed'. I appreciate the time off, it gives me time to sleep and be miserable.

Phobos and Deimos also took liking to me being at home. They would ramble on incessantly about trivial things, getting on my nerves a lot. Sometimes I would shut them out of my room so they would leave me alone.

I was at mid-pour of the milk for my cereal when I heard a knock at my door, at first calm then became quite rampant. I hate it when people beat on my door… it annoys me.

"Hold on!"

Slamming down my milk jug, I stomp to the door, swinging my wounded arm in sync with my stomping. It hurts my shoulder, but I don't really care.

"What the-" I jerk the door open and see Relena and her five bodyguards, Wufei being the culprit of the door banging. Narrowing my eyes at him, I frown.

"What is this?" I ask more to Relena, motioning to them all with the hand on my good arm. "Why are you all here, banging my door?"

"Rei…" Relena pushed back Wufei and stepped towards me, her face looking solemn. "We have to know how you knew…"

I give her an incredulous look. Didn't she say I could tell her when I felt like telling her?

Yep, pretty sure she did tell me that.

"Wait… didn't you say I didn't have to tell you anything?"

She looked to her feet. "Rei, something happened, and we have to know…"

I was getting fed up with this bull crap.

"What?! What happened that is so damn important that you come knocking my door down for?"

She stuck her hand to Heero, who placed a paper inside of it. She unfolded it and glanced at it for a while before she handed it to me.

"This is why."

The note was scrawled onto a piece of notebook paper, little droplets of a red substance staining the surface.

_"Dear Relena,_

_Next time, I will kill you._

_Hold onto your last moment's like gold._

_You don't know when I will strike again."_

I felt my face pale and eyes go wide.

"Shit."

* * *

**End of Chapter Five**

So, more of the plot is developed... hmmm...


	7. Chapter Six: So Small

This challenge was issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge-1'_ in the forum _Peace and War._

Silence: I am so happy about all the feedback I am getting on this story. I am expecting it to be lengthy, so I hope you don't mind!

Raiden: I mind...

Silence: No you don't. This fic has more violence than any of my other ones.

Raiden: Very true... I take back my previous statement.

Silence: Good. Disclaimer?

Raiden" -ahem- Neither Silence nor myself own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing. Do not steal anything about this plot because if you do, Silence, Nerf-chan, and I will kill you.

Thank you to: **Nerf-or-Nothing, Dani, Darkbadkitty, Toowhiteprincess, Mandamirra10, Lady Light, Angel-eyes56, firnoviel, Rena H.M., and LadyNightFyre.**

Also, my YuGiOh fic is in the works. I am trying to get a hefty amount written before posting.

_**

* * *

**_

_**Condolences**_

**Chapter Six: So Small**

_"While you sitting around thinking about what you can't change  
And worrying about all the wrong things  
Time's flying by, moving so fast  
Better make it count, cause you can't get it back"_

I hate my life, I hate my sling, and I hate the cold weather… but most of all, I hate Wufei Chang.

I soon discovered that he is the bane of my existence in this world, always charging at me and degrading me with the term 'woman'. I really am trying my best to stay calm, but it is getting so difficult.

We are now sitting in my living room/dining room area, one of the four rooms in the apartment. My bedroom and bathroom were to the right and the kitchen was just outside the hallway when you first walked in. This place is crammed compared to the space I used to have at the temple.

Oh, sweet memories.

"So, what can you tell us Rei…?" Quatre asked calmly, his hands folded in his lap and back up straight. "Please, take all the time you need."

I feel all of their eyes on me, watching me sit and ponder over the situation. It was now I realized how tacky I looked… black sweat pants, white t-shirt, blue and green striped socks, sling, complete with my hair in a ponytail and no make-up. If this had happened around say, my father's house, I would probably have been beheaded. But, we won't get into the discussion of my father.

What we will discuss however, is how I am going to answer all these guys.

I really don't feel like telling them my entire life story, but I feel as if it is inevitable. The entire start of this story begins when the senshi began. I guess, I will tell as much as I wish as carefully as I can, trying to avoid all possible conflict.

"Well… it's not that complicated…" I look up to the group, hands under my chin. "I just saw it…"

Wufei gave a harsh laugh. "You saw it? You saw a bullet flying through the air and decided to jump in front of it?"

I glare at him. "Shut up!"

"Ok, please calm down…" Relena mumbled. "I don't want anymore fighting."

Hearing her voice, worry inscribed throughout its pleading tone hit a string within my heart, I guess. It pained me to see her hide it all back, trying to keep everyone happy while her life was at risk. There she goes, reminding me of Usagi again.

It was then I made my decision.

"I saw it in a vision ok?" I huffed out, burying my head in my hands, not completely believing what I just said. "I looked at the window, and I had the vision. About the time it was over, it really happened, so I was prepared and acted without thinking."

All in the room was still, not a word being spoken. I could almost hear myself screaming inside, scolding my big mouth for letting lose something so personal. It is one of the only remnants I have of my old life, and I just let it out.

"W-what…?!?" Relena stammered, her eyes as wide as saucers. "Excuse me… but is that even possible?"

"Of course it isn't! It is all nonsense!" Wufei barked, walking in front of me and shoving his index finger in my face. "She speaks lies!"

"Kindly back away from me." I speak calmly, but he doesn't budge. "Kindly remove your finger from my face before I break the damn thing off!"

He still doesn't move; only taunts me with his stares.

"Tell us the truth woman!"

I stand up and put my face close to his, challenging him. "I asked you to move you finger… so I suggest you back off!"

Wufei scowls and moves his hand, but does something that I completely did not expect. He placed both of his hands on my shoulders, shoving me back down onto the loveseat, holding my face roughly with his hand.

"You challenge me?" He spoke harshly, his fingers digging into my face. "Well, I challenge you! I will be damned before the person I am sworn by oath to protect dies because you can't tell us the truth!"

"Wufei! Sit down!" I hear Relena call from her place on the couch. "Let go this instant!"

Before I realize what I am about to do, I do it anyway. It wasn't that the way he was holding my face or the insults that made me take the next action, it was something else altogether. For some reason, I was overcome by a sense of grief. I was thinking about my final day back in my world.

Hence the single tear that began to roll down my face, making Wufei back away.

"Please, stop!" Relena cried again, this time making him completely leave me alone. The other guys just sat there speechless, either looking at Wufei in disgust or at me with worry.

"Rei, are you alright?" Quatre asked, beginning to get up from his place on the couch. "Here, let me get you some-"

"No. Sit down." I instruct him roughly, my pride already damaged from letting my emotions get to me. "I am going to tell you my story. If anyone interrupts me, I swear to the God in heaven I will jump off that balcony."

No one moved.

"Ok…" I rub my face with the hand on my good arm. "Ever since I was a small girl, I have always had these visions. In the past, I was a temple Priestess, so maybe that had something to do with it. I moved here a couple of months ago, trying to leave behind a few bad memories, and a few months later, the city got pummeled with bombs. I found Relena on my way to find help, and since then I keep running into her. I work at the orphanage, my favorite color is red, and my blood type is O."

As I finished my story with that smart ass statement, everyone was still quiet. It was then I remembered my threat.

"Oh, I'm done now. Speak."

Heero was the first to do so.

"There were a lot of uncovered time spans in your story."

I shrugged, looking at him with indifference. I knew there was, but I don't feel like divulging my entire life. I gave them the essentials.

Of course, forgetting to mention the whole senshi bit.

"Babe, I have a question." Duo, the brunette pilot with the long braid, asked while gazing out the window. "Why are those two birds outside your window, staring us down?"

"Oh, they are my pets; Phobos and Deimos."

"You keep crows as pets?" Duo looked confused.

"You wouldn't understand." I give a small smile to the birds outside the window.

"What I want to know is the reason you moved here in the first place." Wufei spoke, this time not using as much malice in his voice. "It had to be pretty bad to move away from everything you once knew to something completely different."

I knew someone was going to ask this question, but instead of it being painstakingly impossible for me to answer as I believed it would, it was sort of simple, easy you might say.

"My best friends were all killed." I look at him, pain filling my eyes. "Is that a good enough reason?"

The room was silent.

"All of my friends were killed, and my best friend saved me… and it was I that was supposed to perish… not her. She was so innocent, so kindhearted! It was my duty to protect her, and I failed! I couldn't even complete my duty! Instead, I was saved by the one I vowed to protect through death!"

I knew my voice was getting louder, and I was almost to the point of screaming. But, I didn't mind so much.

"None of you can understand how that feels. She was the first person to make me smile, the first one to ever care if I was ok. I was supposed to be there for her until the time came for me to die protecting her! I should have died!

"If that wasn't enough, all of my friends died! Every single one of them! I got to watch them all get stolen by the cold fingers of death, their lives slipping out of my own. I had to watch them die!"

I bury my head in my hands again, sobs racking my body. I couldn't control it anymore. I tried to hide it all away, but I just couldn't do it. Just like I couldn't save her, I couldn't save anyone.

"Rei…" I could feel Relena coming closer, but I didn't want her to right now. I wanted her to stay away.

"Leave. All of you kindly escort yourselves out."

Without a word, all of them left, leaving me alone to cry myself to sleep on the loveseat.

* * *

I don't think I have ever felt as worthless and degraded as I do right now.

It is currently six o'clock in the morning, the moon still present in the sky. I have been trying to go back to sleep, but I am entirely too restless. After the discussion I had with everyone today I just cannot make myself do anything. My head hurts and my body aches… everything terrible you can imagine that could happen to the human body.

My room is completely dark, my own hand not visible to me when it's an inch away from my pupils. Funny, I don't remember turning out the lights.

Pushing back my covers and discarding my sling on the floor, I make my way to the door, already feeling helpless enough without having aide from that stupid hindrance. My shoulder hurts still, but I will be back in bed in a second, right after I get a drink.

The light to my living room is off as well, the only sound being that of my footsteps. I am suddenly chilled, my arms getting goose bumps and the hairs on the back of my neck rising. Looking to my right I see my window is cracked, letting in a draft.

Someone is in my apartment.

I stop walking upon this realization. I know for sure I didn't leave that window open, and I'll be damned if I am taken down here. I have already made it this far.

"Come out, you son of a bitch." I state while taking a defense stance. "I know you are here. I feel your presence all around this place."

I got no reply, only the echoing silence I heard before.

I always wondered how I would feel if a situation like this only turned out to be paranoia. I would have given a speech and freaked out for no reason. Not to mention the horrid blow to my self esteem, as if it could get any lower anyway. But, I knew this was real.

I could feel the intruder, as if his heart beat was my own.

"I don't know who you are, but you do not scare me." I say more to myself than out loud. "Show yourself!"

My eyes are beginning to adjust finally, but the location of this stranger is still unknown to me. I hate feeling so vulnerable.

"I believe you are more scared then you are letting on."

The stranger speaks, but I cannot tell where his voice is coming from, I look all around the room, but I cannot see him.

The scary part is, he can see me.

"I am not scared of you."

Right after I said that, he grabs me in a chokehold, my neck being strangled between his bicep and forearm. I can feel his hot breath on my ear, his words taunting me.

"Oh, I do think you are."

I try to use my hands to pry myself loose, but his arm is pure muscle, keeping me from causing any damage. My breathing is becoming strained; I feel my head pounding more than it already was.

"What… do… you… want…"

He pushed his arms tighter together, constricting my breath intake even more. I knew he was laughing at me in his mind.

"I want to tell you that along with Relena, I am going to come after you. I want you to be prepared. I can sense that you have potential." He bends down low now, his mouth just centimeters away from my ear. "You aren't the only physic in this world."

I know my eyes widened, for I could feel them. However, I had run out of most of my oxygen, so when he let me go, I promptly passed out and hit the ground.

* * *

**End of Chapter Six**

So... more plot developement...


	8. Chapter Seven: Iris

This challenge was issued by **Nerf-or-Nothing's** _'Rei Challenge-1'_ in the forum _Peace and War._

Hello, one and all. I would like to take this time to apologize for the tardiness of this update. With school and Christmas stuff going on, I just haven't had the time to update as frequently as I wanted. This chapter is is my longest chapter for this story yet, and hopefully they continue to get longer.

I am also planning on posting my YuGiOh/SailorMoon crossover today. I have enough of it written in advance that I feel comfortable with posting it. I also plan on updating We Who are Cursed soon. Hopefully in the next week. This break from school is just what I need to move forward.

Raiden: Yeah, whatever. You are just caught up in playing with your PS3.

Silence: That too. Assassin's Creed is so badass. So is Call of Duty 4. I got my butt kicked in Virtua Fighter 5 by my boyfriend, so I avoid playing it when he's around.

Raiden: You did get your ass kicked. I laughed.

Silence: Disclaimer?

Raiden: We own nothing. **Nerf-or-Nothing** created the guidelines for this story.

Thank you to...**Nerf-or-Nothing, Perfection's Scream, Lady Light, Mandamirra10, Rena H.M., firnoviel, Reiko, Angel-eyes56** and **DarkbadKitty** for reviewing! They made me soooo happy!_**

* * *

**_

Condolences 

**Chapter Seven: Iris**

_"I don't want the world to see me_

_Because I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am"_

I woke up the next morning with the worst headache I think I have ever had to endure, the walls of my skull feeling as though they would split open in a matter of seconds. My neck felt swollen, his fingers etched into my flesh even though the intruder was no longer here. Now that it was daylight, I could see my only lamp knocked to the floor and my window still cracked open, letting in the cold of the winter air.

Pushing myself off the ground, I feel my spine pop, result of passing out cold on the floor all night I guess. Standing up steadily, I get to my feet, holding myself with my arms. My hair draped around me, covering my body in its black curtain. Stumbling towards the bathroom, I go inside, shutting the door behind me. Turning my head slightly, I can see the black bruises around my throat, his fingerprints on me. I close my eyes and slump against the door, sliding down its wooden surface to the ground.

I could feel water welling up in my eyes, threatening to escape my tear ducts and run down my face. How could I have been so reduced to this? I was once a princess, then a priestess, then a Senshi… now I am just a lost girl who keeps running into problems. I have no family… I am just a lost cause.

Rubbing my eyes free of the tears I proceed to sit on the bathroom tile, continuing the pity party I am throwing for myself. Everything just seems so pointless, all of it just one game after another. Why do I continue to live if I am serving no purpose?

But, maybe I do have a purpose and I just haven't found it yet. If that is the case, I am tired of waiting and I want it to come out. However, life can never be that simple. You always have to look between the lines to find what you're supposed to do.

Perhaps I still have a chance. I might still have a chance to redeem myself in this life. Even with Usagi's death, I might still be able to find something to believe in, something to fight for.

I think this is what made me get off the floor, and wipe my tears, look myself straight in the eyes and say that I can't give up.

I also believe that this is what made me dig Relena's number out from the bottom of my purse.

* * *

I am now standing in the center of the hotel lobby, donned in a black trench coat, red turtleneck, and jeans with my suitcases surrounding my feet. After I spoke with Relena, she said that it wasn't safe for me to be at my apartment alone, so she offered to let me stay at her house. 

However, I turned it down.

I didn't want to be living under the same roof as her for no reason, for my sanity as well as her own protection. I told her the only way I would move would be if I was accepted into her military guard.

She told me that would be no problem.

I was told to immediately pack my belongings and to be waiting in the hotel lobby at noon, and my chaperone to the military base would be there to escort me. Relena asked me no more questions, nor did she want to know my motifs, only told me that she appreciated the fact I wanted to join her military. Little did she know that it would make me feel better in so many ways than she could believe possible.

I would finally feel like I belonged somewhere. I wouldn't feel as though I was a lonely, lost girl anymore. Phobos and Deimos liked the idea, considering that they wanted me to help her in the first place.

My need to fight for something would be satiated and my past as the Senshi of War would come back into my life. Both of those things are crucial to my existence I found out in the past months.

However, I am going to miss working at the orphanage. Elizabeth would now have to get along with the other Sisters and children instead of depend on me for leverage. I am going to miss that girl terribly…

"Miss Hino?"

Snapping out of my reverie I see Quatre and Trowa standing before me, the blonde holding a look of question while Trowa held his same impassive stare as the times before. As much as I wanted to look away from the latter of the two, it was very hard for me to do so. For some reason, I find that man very intriguing and I want to learn more about him. Which I might add, is very odd because I don't take to men that often.

"Oh, yes… Sorry." I rubbed the back of my head and then picked up my bags. "We ready to go?"

The blonde gave a warm smile and nodded. "The car is outside waiting on us."

On that note, Trowa picked up my remaining two suitcases and walked out the door, Quatre and I both behind him. While we walked I think Quatre picked up on my interest in the stoic young man, bringing him up in random conversation.

"He has always been quiet." I look to Quatre, who is looking ahead. "Trowa is a good man though. Tough past from what I understand."

I gave a small nod. A hard past was one thing I could understand. It seemed like yesterday that I was abandoned by my father and watching my friends get slaughtered.

"Well, let's get to the base then."

Quatre took my suitcases for me and placed them in the trunk, situating them nicely with the ones Trowa had put in already. As he rounded the driver's side of the little, black car, I went to the passenger's side, reaching for the door that led to the backseat.

However, Trowa beat me to it.

"Here you are, Miss Rei." He opened the door and watched me as I sat down, shutting the door upon my rear reaching the leather interior.

I could only mutter a thank you in response to this act, as Quatre sped away towards the base.

* * *

Upon our arrival we were greeted by Relena, who literally welcomed me with open arms. I inwardly wanted to throw up, but I held it in.

"I am so glad you are ok, Rei!" She smiled at me as I plastered on a fake one to match. "You are just a magnet for trouble it seems!"

Yeah, tell me about it Sherlock. I should be dead.

Before I could respond she peeled down the top of the neck of my shirt, revealing the bruises from that man's intrusion. She winced and I could see Quatre follow suit out of the corner of my eye. Trowa just looked like he usually does; except his mouth was pursed into a firm line and I could feel a negative aura radiating from him.

Was that his way to show anger?

"Oh, God…" She released my clothing and looked at me, a sympathetic look donning her face. "Did that man do this to you?"

I didn't answer, only looked to the ground. It was embarrassing to admit I was caught off guard by a man. Men… the source of most of my problems.

"I am so glad that you called." Relena grabbed my arm and began to lead me towards the entrance to the base. "You know, you didn't have to join my guard."

"I know." I stated monotonously, but inside I did know that I had to. I needed something to fight for again.

"Ok, well then I will show you to your barracks." She huffed, acting like she was hoping for a change of heart. Leading me down a long hallway, Trowa and Quatre in tow with my bags, she stopped at the last door, opening it to reveal a tiny room. A twin bed sat in one corner while a small dresser sat beside it. A closet the size of a public bathroom stall was on the opposing wall, leaving the room very empty.

"Each member of my personal guard gets issued a room identical to this one, including the former pilots. I know it's not very much-"

"It is perfect." I answered her, not letting her get ahead of herself with unnecessary apologies. "It is exactly what I wanted."

She smiled a minute, moving aside so Trowa and Quatre could bring in my suitcases. I could see the perplexity on her face, like she was searching deep within herself to figure out why I would ask for such a job when she offered me a home without pay. Offering my own smirk, I place a kind hand on her shoulder.

"I know you don't understand now…" She looked at me still with confused eyes. "But, before this is all said and done, you will know why I need this. You will understand why I need to fight for something."

I looked up to Trowa and Quatre, who were looking at me with an expression much like Relena's. "You will all understand one day who I am, I promise."

* * *

The weeks to follow were filled with work out, running miles and lifting tons. I had somehow managed to keep up with the guys, even though it was by pure luck and effort. When we would all go on our morning runs I was usually tagging along beside Quatre, who didn't mind the company. While lifting weights, most of the guys were good about rotating to spot me, with the exception of Wufei, who saw it as an injustice for me to be allowed in the weight room.

Learning to disassemble and reassemble guns, along with teaching me the names and capabilities of weapons was the task left to Heero. He would take a gun apart and then time me while I put it back together. As a reward for doing it fast enough he would take apart a more complicated weapon, moving me on to the next stage of development.

Quatre was assigned to teaching me about communication devices and hacking equipment. I knew as soon as he showed me the immense amount of technologically advanced equipment that Ami would have had a field day here. He was probably the most kind of my teachers, allowing me to make mistakes without biting my head off.

The comical one of the group, Duo, taught me how to shoot all the weapons Heero told me about, showing me the lengths and circumstances under which they should be used. We discovered that I was pretty good with long distance shots, earning me my very own sniper rifle.

The last of my daily lessons was with Trowa, who trained me in hand to hand combat. Before coming here, I figured I would be good in this area, but alas, I was far from it. I never realized how many complicated moves there were or that there were signs to look for on the enemy to assess which moves to use. Every day I train with Trowa, I always think about Makoto and the daily beatings she would issue to those whom crossed her path.

Much to my surprise, Wufei even helped out a little. Between his complaints and temper tantrums, he would help me with the stuff I had a hard time understanding. When Heero would issue me some 'homework' on calculating distances between weapons and targets, the Chinese man would assist me with the math, considering I was terrible in that area of study in every aspect.

Now I am sitting on the edge of my bed, setting my alarm for five p.m., the usual time of our morning jogs. It is hard to believe that I was beginning to feel almost back to normal again, like my life had purpose.

However, a feeling for revenge still rested on my shoulders, looming over me like a shadow. Blood was still left for me to take, to quench my thirst for the wrongs done to me in my old life.

With this looming in my mind I settled into my bed, only pulling the comforter up to my stomach. It got way too hot in this place at night. Before I closed my eyes though, I made sure my pistol lay safely underneath my mattress, since there was no telling what intruder would come visit me in these times.

* * *

"Good morning, Rei!" Duo beamed as he poured himself a cup of coffee. It took me awhile to get used to his sunny behavior in the morning, since it was well known I was far from the end of that spectrum. He was always like that though, unless he got turned down for a date.

"Good morning." I spoke shortly, walking to the table and making me a bowl of cereal. "What is on the agenda today?"

The brunette shrugged as he joined me at the table, his braid slung across his shoulder. He was wearing a t-shirt and pajama pants, slippers covering his feet.

"I dunno. I think we are just hanging out today."

"No training, then?"

He shook his head no as he sipped his coffee. "As far as my understanding goes, we aren't. Relena wanted Heero to go with her somewhere and Quatre went to visit his sisters."

"Oh, sounds good to me." I took a few bites of my cereal and thought about what I could do with my day of freedom. It came to me quickly, though.

"What are you planning on doing with your day?"

I left my spoon resting on the side of my bowl, floating in the milk as I took a swig of orange juice. "Well, I think I will go see Elizabeth."

Duo gave a big grin and stood from his chair, setting his empty mug in the sink. "I plan on going on a date."

I quirk an eyebrow. Who could Duo possibly be going out on a date with? We had been training constantly, leaving no free time. He couldn't have been seeing anyone between then, right?

"Who agreed to go on a date with you?"

He began to laugh nervously and walk out of the room, but before leaving, he shed some light on the situation.

"Well, no one yet. But, I will find a pretty lady."

With that, the brunette walked out, leaving a smile on my face.

* * *

Soon after I ate breakfast I made my way back to my room, digging through my closet for something that didn't resemble fatigues or work out clothes. After a few moments I dug out a pair of jeans, but forgot that I hadn't put them on in about a month, and they no longer fit. It appeared as though I had dropped a size thanks to my workouts. Pulling the huge jeans on and using my black belt to keep them up, I determined that they would work, even if they did make me feel like a bum.

Finding a proper shirt wasn't as hard. I just pulled out the same red turtleneck I wore on my first day here. My hair looked ok, so I didn't mess with it. Before walking out of my room though, I grabbed my black trench coat and stuffed my pistol inside. One thing I was taught here was to always be ready.

Upon walking out of my room and into the kitchen, heading for the garage, I saw Trowa pouring himself a cup of coffee. He was already dressed, wearing jeans and a green t-shirt, usual look of indifference on his face.

"Good morning, Trowa."

"Good morning, Rei." He looked at me before he sat down, coffee cup between his hands. "Where are you going?"

I buried my hands in my coat pocket, forgetting my pistol was there until I felt it. "I want to go see Elizabeth."

He gave a nod of understanding and continued to drink his coffee.

"What are your plans for the day?"

He shrugged and fiddled with his coffee mug, spinning it around in circles between his palms. "Nothing, really. I will try and find something to do, though. I don't want to be the only one here to be between Wufei and Duo."

"Why don't you come with me? It will give you something to do and me some company." He gave me a curious look, so I added a little extra to my method of convincement. "Besides, Elizabeth will be extremely excited to see you."

The brunette stood from his place and dumped his remaining coffee in the sink, setting the now empty cup inside. The last comment seemed to have sealed the deal.

"I guess I could tag along." He stated, taking his coat from the back of his chair. Digging keys out of his left pocket, he opened the door to the garage with his right. "Let's take the jeep."

* * *

**End of Chapter Seven**

So, will all go well in their town excursion?


	9. Chapter Eight: Follow the Sun Down

Hmm... sorry about the wait. I redid this chapter about a million times, just not liking anything I wrote. But, this was decent enough, and it is the longest chapter yet.

I posted my SM/YGO cross shortly after posting Ch. 7 of this story. I hope those of you who have read it enjoyed the prologue. It has a couple love triangles in it, something I am not used to writing much.

Raiden: Which is partly my fault, because that romance crap bugs me.

Silence: Anywho, enjoy this chapter.

Thank you to... **Perfection's Scream, Darkbadkitty, Rena H.M., firnoviel, Mandamirra10, Angel-eyes56, **and **reina shirahime! **I love you guys!

Silence: Raiden... disclaimer, now!

Raiden: Ugh. We don't own anything, and **Nerf-or-Nothing** gave us the challenge. Copy anything here and we will all hunt you down and hang you by your toes.

* * *

_**Condolences**_

**Chapter Eight: Follow the Sun Down**

_"Chances come and chances leave you  
Stranded on the beaten path  
I'm not looking for what's too good to be true  
I'd sure love to see you laugh"_

Trowa and I had been driving for about five minutes now, he occupying the driver's seat while I sat as passenger. For the most part the ride thus far has been silent, except for the small bits I managed to catch by chance. Glancing at him out of the corner of my eye, I smile, but only a small one. For some reason, I just can't get enough of his silence.

Beside me he looked ahead, his one visible eye lazily watching the road as he turned the steering wheel slightly with the hand that sat comfortably at its base. The cold weather had lifted some outside, but still prevailed along with some rain clouds, casting a shadow down onto his somber form. Even with the darkness surrounding him, I still couldn't help but be in awe.

A part of me wants to scold myself for being so captivated by him, while another part is telling me it is ok. Men have always been a sore spot on my life, so the part of my conscience that is chiding me for being interested is beginning to overwhelm the rest. Then again, I haven't even spent that much time with him one-on-one, so how do I know he is even a nice guy to get worked up about?

I believe the reason for me acting so unlike myself towards him is because he is more like me than any other man I have met. The others were spineless, unable to comprehend the world that I live in everyday. Yet, Trowa has been where I have been. He relates to the problems I have had and still do deal with.

It is these things that make me want to try harder.

"Are you excited to see Elizabeth?" He asked, although quiet, still managed to make it loud enough for me to hear. It seemed like he was nervous about bringing about a conversation, which was ok, because I was too.

"Oh, yeah." I exhaled deeply while saying this, showing a sign of inner relief. "I never realized I would miss the little terror this much."

"Hm," He nodded in understanding as he proceeded to drive. "She did seem like she could be a heathen at times."

I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. "I doubt you were exactly an angel when you were her age."

With this I guess I prodded at a touchy subject. I could see his grip on the steering wheel tighten and mouth squeeze into a thin line. Oh, crap.

"Yeah, hardly."

Now that my confidence in continuing the conversation has been severed, I look down to my hands, which are folded neatly in my lap, and begin to think at the plausible reasons for his anger. Did he have a shitty childhood like I did? Or did I just cross the line into unfavorable territory? Either way, I officially screwed over the entire thing, and probably made him angry.

"But, while on the subject, I have my doubts you were the family sweetheart, either."

Now that the situation was reversed and my childhood was brought into the spotlight, I can understand why he might have felt angry. My childhood was the one of the few things I deeply hated to talk about, most of the time because I had to bring _him_ into the mix.

"That would make sense I guess."

I don't really know where that answer came from, because it was one of the last things I planned on saying. Maybe it was from the fact that no one truly asked me about my childhood before. Well, he didn't exactly ask… but led onto it.

After that we dropped that subject, I am assuming because the tension had grow to unimaginable heights and was continuing to escalate. He came up with the last topic, so I guess it is my turn.

"Thank you for coming with me today." That wasn't what I was aiming for, but it will work. My brain just isn't with me today… or maybe it is with me a little too much. "I hope it wasn't a bother."

"It wasn't. Thank you for letting me come visit Elizabeth with you."

After that the silence commenced again. Why couldn't I hold a conversation? Was I scared that I would say something dumb and ruin all of my chances? Ugh, since when have a cared anyway?

"What do you think about the situation with Relena?" Trowa asked, interrupting my train of thought. Finally, we are speaking about a neutral subject. "We haven't heard from anyone in about a month."

I shrugged. "Maybe they are waiting for something."

He shook his head and sighed. "What could they possibly be waiting on?"

That I had no idea how to answer, because I myself had no clue why the new enemy was waiting so long. I have received no more visions and no more threats were issued to Relena… did we need to worry anymore?

"We're here."

With my thoughts being focused on either the enemy or the ass I making of myself during the drive, I failed to notice that we pulled into the parking lot of the orphanage. St. Ann's orphanage was a smaller building, bricked with brown stone and decorated with stained-glass windows. Shrubs outlined the exterior, a rose bush tucked away in the right hand corner of the building. It was a calm place, a place a missed.

However, there was something different.

Before I left, everyday I would walk to work I could always hear the children laughing and playing in the playground. Today, only the soft rustle of the ferns surrounding the orphanage made a sound. With each step my stomach began to churn more and more, swirling and making me want to gag. Something bad was in the air.

"Trowa…" He turned and faced me, a confused expression on his face. "Something is wrong."

My hands began to tremble as I stepped a few paces forward, the wind pushing beside my face. Reaching into my coat pocket, I checked again to make sure I had my pistol. It was there, but before I could pull it out, Trowa put a hand on my shoulder.

"Rei… what do you mean something is wrong?" If it were any other time, I probably would have freaked about him touching me, but only Elizabeth lingered on my mind.

"I can feel it. Something isn't right."

As if on cue, Trowa revealed his gun, which he had tucked safely in his coat as well. Placing it back into his pocket, he gave me a confident gaze.

"If anything happens, we will be ready."

I returned his reassuring statement with a nod, too nervous to do anything else.

He went ahead of me, walking slowly to the door and taking the handle, almost instantly reeling back in response. His eyes grew wide as he looked at his hand, which was now coated in blood.

Now my beliefs were confirmed. Something did indeed happen inside the orphanage.

"When I open the door, cover me."

I nodded an affirmative and drew my gun, holding it between both of my hands and index finger on the trigger. Mouthing the countdown, I held the gun to my chest, feeling my breathing almost cease as he mouthed the word 'one'.

Throwing open the door, I extended my arms, keeping my eyes open and mind ready. After hearing Trowa draw his own weapon and only the sound of our breathing I reasoned it was safe enough to evaluate the damage.

The foyer was destroyed, papers that used to be neatly filed and broken vases littered the ground. A painting of the crucifixion that once hung in the dining hall now lay in the middle of the floor, covered in broken glass.

I looked over to Trowa with eyes that I am sure seemed to be on fire. Giving a nod over to the entrance of the dining hall, we followed the same procedure as before, except I opened the door and he went in first. This room was much worse than the previous.

Tables were overturned, dishes broken; half eaten breakfast sat unfinished on the counter tops… it was unbearable. I could only imagine how scared the poor kids were, especially Elizabeth.

On the ground were smudges of blood, footprints smeared into the ground with the red stain. Juice bottles were turned over, contents spilling onto the ground and leaking into the tile edges. Chairs were turned onto their sides, the four metal poles that were attached to the bottom now sticking up and about. On the ground was a busted bowl, macaroni noodles attached to the broken porcelain.

"Oh, God…" I mutter, lowering my gaze and my weapon. Bringing a hand to my chest, I clutch the fabric of my shirt, trying to make myself feel better by relinquishing built up tension. I hate this feeling of hopelessness. The last time I felt like this was when Usagi died.

"Rei…" Trowa called out from across the room, making me forget my own sadness. He sat crouched behind a table, and it wasn't until I got over to him that I realized why he beckoned me forward.

On the floor, propped up against the counter and blood trickling from her cheek, was Sister Mary. Her eyes were barely open, both hands clutched at her stomach where an unwelcome pool of blood rested. Her robes were dirty and stained, her pale face reflecting what was soon to come.

"Rei…" She whispered, spitting a crimson liquid from her mouth only to run down her chin. "They… took… they took… the children…"

Placing a hand on her shoulder for comfort, Sister Mary lifted one of her own, placing it on my wrist. I could feel her blood run down my hand, making me want to trade my life for her own. Why did the innocent always have to die?

"Sister Mary, who took the children?" I pleaded, afraid that her time was soon to run out. Her eyes began to roll around in her skull, eyelids closing randomly and out of sync. "Sister Mary…?"

"They came this morning… when we… we were all eating…." She spit up again, this time more profusely than the last. "They came swiftly… I tried to stop them…"

"Ma'am, who took them?" Trowa asked this time, crouched beside me and watching the woman intently. "Who hurt you?"

"He is… still here." With one last cough and violent strain, the grasp she held on my arm relinquished.

Trowa pushed me closer to the table, making me drop my hold on Sister Mary's shoulder. At first I was confused, but soon afterward the final statement of Sister Mary rang in my ears.

_He is still here._

"Rei, be on your guard." Trowa instructed, readying his weapon again. "I will lead us back into the bedrooms… cover me from behind. If she is giving accurate information, whoever did this is still in the area."

We both stood quickly, glancing about the room and ready to fire. Trowa then began to make his way to the hallway leading to the children's rooms. There are a total of seven rooms; three were for the boys and four for the girls. Elizabeth's room was the second on the right.

Passing the first few, we noticed that the rooms were in relatively good shape. Only a few knocked over lampshades and toys here and there. As we neared the last one however, a foreboding feeling crept over me, making me stop where I was. Trowa noticed this, but still kept his indifferent gaze.

"He's in the last room." I whispered, my own nerves shot. All I knew, was when I laid eyes on the bastard associated with this, the one who killed Sister Mary… he was going to be mercilessly slaughtered.

Creeping to the outskirts of the room, we pinned ourselves against the wall, waiting for the time when we were both ready. After we had ourselves situated, it only took a nod from Trowa for me to get the picture.

Everything happened so fast, I could hardly comprehend the situation at all. I remember both of us charging into the room… and then I am here.

"You stupid son of a bitch!" I find myself screaming while I am smashing the guys face in with my fist. I had somehow knocked away his gun during the scramble, so now the only thing keeping me from killing the man was Trowa, who had found it time to restrain me.

"Rei! Rei, calm down! If you kill him, he can't help us!" Trowa held my arms back, leaving me able to only glare at the man I just assaulted. He was young, but that was now hidden behind the bloody mass that was now his face. He wore black pants and a brown jacket, boots donning his limp feet.

After letting me go and hoisting me to my feet, Trowa aimed his weapon at the man, speaking in his calm voice.

"Where are the children?"

The man spat on the ground and wiped his eyes of the blood, shaking his head violently.

"I… I don't know! I know nothing!" His voice was heavy with an accent, although it was unknown to me.

Trowa frowned and put his foot on the man's chest, applying pressure to make the man squirm. He did not wavier as he pointed his gun at the victim.

"I am going to ask you one more time… where are the children?"

The man's eyes darted around, blinking rapidly as the trails of his own blood ran into his eyes. He took a deep breath.

"I don't know! They say for me to come with them… then they take childrens… and then they leave! They told me to stay…." He wiped his eyes again. "They never say why!"

"Who are they?" His voice was dark, different from the other times I had spent with him. It was very intimidating.

"They say they are called 'Black Star'."

Without another word, Trowa pulled out his cell phone, hitting a number on speed dial.

"Heero, we have a situation."

* * *

I am finally home after the stressful day at the now abandoned orphanage. Everyone had canceled their plans and met up with us about thirty minutes after Trowa's call, Relena included. The man, who we found was named Armando, was taken to the infirmary and put in jail for questioning. I thought he should be killed, but Relena about had a stroke when I suggested that. 

Trowa and I had taken the rode back to the base in silence, both of us too swarmed with thoughts to make small talk. It was like a switch had been flipped on both of our personalities, making us return to our silent ways.

Sitting in the passenger's seat, legs pulled up to my chest and arms draped around them, I stare out the window, watching the buildings and cars go by in a blur. What I wanted to do now more than anything was to cry. But, me being myself, I won't allow myself to indulge on such a thought. I can't show weakness. Not until Elizabeth is safe.

Maybe if I would have just adopted her, regardless of my funds, she wouldn't be in this situation. I can't help but dwell on the fact that I could have stopped it, I could have saved her.

I couldn't save my mom, I couldn't save my grandpa, I couldn't save my friends, and apparently I couldn't save the girl I had grown to love as my daughter.

What good am I if I can't help anyone?

"None..." I said as I exhaled, making it barely audible, even for myself.

But, maybe there is still hope for me. I haven't let Relena down yet.

"Rei," Trowa spoke, interrupting my string of thoughts. I am not going to lie, it was very much appreciated. "It's not your fault."

How he knew that I was still wallowing around in self regret, I will never know. But, to hear him say it wasn't my fault made me feel a tad better. Hell, just hearing him talk made me feel better. Anything was greater than hearing myself mope.

"We will get her back." Feeling a hand on my shoulder, I turn my head, just in time to see a reassuring nod. "I promise."

* * *

**End of Chapter Eight**


	10. Chapter Nine: Come All You Weary

I apologize for the long absence, my friends! I have had a very busy life here recently, keeping me from fullfilling my duties here. However, here is a chapter!

It is rather short, but the next one is longer. This one is more emotional nonsense, the next having all action.

Balance... marvelous!

Raiden: Ugh, I hate emotion! I want to kill everyone! (Begins to reenact the Boondock Saints).

Silence: We know you are a mean fighting machine.

Raiden: We own nothing! This story came about as a challenge from **Nerf-or-Nothing**! Look at the forum for the outline of rules and such!

Thank you to... **Rena H.M** (For sending 3 reviews as a reminder and a kick in the arse to get in gear!), **Calidiva**, **Cali**, **Angel**-**eyes56**, **Perfection's** **Scream**, **reina** **shirahime**, **Darkbadkitty**,** firnoviel**, and **Mandamirra10.**

* * *

_**Condolences**_

**Chapter Nine: Come All You Weary**

"_Come all you weary with your heavy loads  
Lay down your burdens find rest for your souls  
Cause my yoke is easy and my burden is kind  
I'll take yours upon me and you can take mine"_

The weeks to follow the disappearance of the children of St. Ann's orphanage were difficult to say in the least, for everyone. Relena was now under constant surveillance and my squad was supposed to be on constant guard, ready to deploy for action at any given moment. However, even as the time passed on, my heart never grew lighter from the guilt.

Training became more strenuous, longer periods of the day were dedicated to preparing for battle, and the emotional capacity of the base seemed to shrink. Everyone was on edge. Even a change could be seen in Heero, who I believe fears for Relena's safety, even though he defends himself each time Duo or I hurl this accusation at him.

There have been no more developments in the investigation. Armando had been thoroughly interrogated and put to many tests, each saying he is speaking the truth when he says he knows nothing other than what was previously stated. I tried to suggest disposing of him, but Relena would hear nothing of it and told me to stop trying to convince her otherwise.

Now I sit in my barracks, wearing a white t-shirt with cut-off sleeves and black workout shorts, searching for updates on the case on my laptop (which is one of the many gifts Relena has imposed upon me as of late). The military mainframe was exceptionally difficult to get into, but with Quatre's help, I was able to get in easily. He understood my need to know about progression in these times before anyone else.

"Nothing… again." I slammed my notebook shut, not particularly caring if the screen split. "Are they even trying to figure out anything?!"

Resting my head in my hands, I can only wonder how everything turned out this way. Everyone I have loved has always been terminated in some way. I cannot hold on to anyone, for if I do, I am dooming them to their fate, one of eventual death.

"Hey, Rei…" I hear a voice outside my door, a slight knock, knock following shortly after. "Relena wants to take us all out to dinner."

Before I can protest, he adds more.

"She said it is mandatory, so you have to come." He laughed a little bit. "So, wear one of those little dresses she bought you and come on!"

"Ugh, you pervert." I sigh. "I'll be out in a minute."

I hear his retreating footsteps and begin to rummage through my wardrobe, passing through the torrents of t-shirts and jeans, looking for one of the many dresses Relena had purchased for me for occasions such as these. Finally touching something that didn't resemble that of denim or cotton, I pull out a black, satin dress and matching black heels.

The dress was fairly simple, a halter with a sea of black satin flowing from an empire waist bow. The heels were at least 3 inches high, something I didn't mind because of my past as a senshi. However, the plunging neckline was something I could see posing a problem, especially with someone like Duo attending.

I walk into the small kitchen to find everyone ready. Quatre, always the gentleman, wore a nice tuxedo complete with boutonnière. His smile could shine through the deepest and darkest abyss, rescuing anyone that might have fallen victim to its black tendrils. Duo wore a black suit and a blue tie, but was currently hiding behind the blonde as Wufei attempted to strangle him. The Chinaman decided not to wear anything special for the occasion, just a pair of black pants and a clean, white shirt. Apparently, he wasn't too excited. Trowa stood off the side, lounging in his brown suit. He stared at the possible fight in disinterest.

Heero and Relena stood closest to the door, the former standing protectively beside the latter. He wore an army-green jacket and brown pants, his hair in its usual style of messy. Relena had her hands clasped in front of her chest as her white, flowing dress shimmered in the faint light. Golden hair was curled in huge barrel curls, bouncing up and down when she would jump out of the way of the scuffle. However, when she realized I had arrived, her eyes began to glow, making me sick to my stomach for reasons that just hit me.

She looked just like Serenity in her white dress and brilliant hair, eyes sparkling for no reason at all.

And I hated it.

"Oh, Rei! You look so wonderful!"

I could only stare in return.

"Dang, Rei! Who would have known that under your boyish exterior as my fellow killing machine, you would be a total babe?"

I don't believe I will need to tell you who those words belonged too.

Duo was ignored by all parties involved as we began to exit the kitchen and head for the parking garage. Heero and Relena led the way to the Vice Foreign Minister's stretch limo, us all following behind. Quatre had been successful in the separation of Duo and Wufei, making sure to keep the silence between them by bringing up a conversation with the braided man. Wufei lingered behind them, leaving Trowa and I at the rear.

We hadn't spoken much since the day Elizabeth was kidnapped. Of course, we would indulge in casual conversation every once in a while, but it always concerned the investigation. Never anything like the drive to the orphanage.

I can't decide if I want it to happen again or not.

We arrived at the five-star restaurant soon after we departed from the base. It was exactly as I expected. Fancy tables and wine seemed to be the only things here, along with waiters who faked French accents and attempted to grow facial hair. They all wore white tuxedos and black ties, carrying around trays of different drinks and salads. A small dance floor resided in the center, along with a band on a small stage that played classical pieces. The waiter at the host desk led us to a round table towards the back a few moments after we entered, wine bottles lingering on its surface.

I was one of the first to sit down, not wanting to create one of those awkward situations in which you have to choose who to sit by. In the end, I found Trowa and Duo beside me, Relena and Heero our opposite with Quatre and Wufei filling in the distance between us. After taking our orders, we received our salads and wine glasses, the latter finding itself very easy to empty.

"Thank you, Relena for taking us out to a fine dinner." Quatre expressed his gratitude early on in the meal, but I knew he wouldn't forget to do so again afterwards as well. "It sure is a change from Duo's burnt macaroni."

"Hey! I try!" The brunette exclaimed, his eyes shifting to his usual opponent. "At least it's better than Wufei's attempt to make… I don't know… anything!"

"Maxwell, I could cremate your cooking skills any day. I just don't cook because a real warrior does not have to make his own meals. He gets them from people like you."

Before another argument could ensue, Relena stepped in.

"Hehehe…" She laughed nervously, taking a sip of wine. "I figured that you guys would enjoy a night out. There is even an unlimited amount of wine for you guys so you all can loosen up!"

Duo had apparently forgotten about his argument with Wufei. "I dig wine."

Our food arrived sometime later, coincidently after we had all consumed a heavy amount of wine, making the dinner actually quite enjoyable. Everyone was getting along quite nicely, with the exception of Wufei and Duo of course, and we were all talking. I cannot remember a time since _then_ that I have felt so relaxed. Although I had not known these people prior to this destruction, it felt like this was how it was supposed to be. This was how everything needed to be.

Relena and Heero departed after they finished, making their way to the dance floor. I know if I were to ask the stoic warrior whose idea it was he would claim it as Relena's, but I know it was all his. However, I would never ask him, for the fear he would blast a hole through my skull.

"Miss, can I ask for this dance?" I turned to see Duo beside me, extending his hand beside my chair. He smiled widely as I accepted.

"Only for one song. I don't dance." Thankfully, I knew the current song was almost over anyway, so it would be short.

He smirked. "Oh, contraire my fair lady, you do dance. I noticed you dancing at Relena's ball."

I rolled my eyes at his hysterics as he led us to the dance floor. "Whatever. That was for the pure enjoyment of Elizabeth and Relena."

"I don't think so! I would even say it was for your enjoyment." Duo took my hand in his and put his other on my waist as we began to sway to the music. "I know what you are up to, Miss Rei."

"Do enlighten me." I quirked an eyebrow, exhaling a little louder than normal. "Considering I have no idea what you are talking about."

Before he could answer, the song ended, everyone's clapping drowning anything he might have said prior to then. But, whenever I turned to ask him he was gone, another man standing in his place.

"I know you only said one song, but could you honor me with a dance?" Trowa asked, the amount of wine consumed evident with the frankness of his speech.

I obliged by putting one of my hands in his, a move I am even unsure why I made, and he led me to the center of the floor. We swayed in silence, my stilettos making a click with each step.

"So, tell me Rei, why did your face waver when you saw Relena earlier this evening?" My look of surprise made him explain I suppose. "I noticed it."

I wasn't expecting him, or anyone else for that matter, to notice. I didn't even think I made it that noticeable. However, the ever quiet and observant Trowa never misses anything.

"She reminds me of a friend…" I answered honestly. "She looked just like Relena looked then."

He looked off into the crowd, his head partially turned to me. "I see. Is it the same friend that was lost to you?"

I looked down. "Yes…"

And before I knew what was happening, I ran.

* * *

I don't think I realized how good it felt to be in his strong arms until now, tears running down my face as we stood in the middle of the parking lot, against the restaurant's brick exterior. Tears seemed to fall in torrents down my face, my cheek plastered against his chest. I don't know why I am behaving so irrationally. It must be the alcohol.

However, I can't stop thinking about the saying that states the truth comes out with intoxication.

I didn't get very far in my attempt of escape before he caught up with me, holding my crying self in his embrace. To be honest, I knew that this day would come. The day I finally acknowledged the fact that Relena would forever be Usagi to me.

"Rei, sometimes it is ok to cry…" He consoled me, his grip never faltering. "I was once told that acting on your emotions was essential to being human, it separates us from those who feel nothing."

"I know…" I admitted, my sobs beginning to get louder. "But, it hurts so much to see her! I can't look at her without seeing Usagi! Usagi is dead, but Relena won't ever let me forget! I want to forget..."

Trowa slipped a finger under my chin and lifted my head, his somber face echoing as much sadness as mine does now. "You do not want to forget. I remember a time when I said as much, but as time went by I figured out that I truly did not want to forget anything. I learned that I needed to remember it all. I needed to cherish every moment. Because without memories, we are nothing but jars of clay; we are empty and break at the slightest abuse."

I was amazed by the truth in his words. Had I been so reduced by time and hate that I had become one of these jars he had spoken of? Battered by pain and forever hating myself that I have broken into a thousand pieces? My soul empty and unaided?

"I know that everything seems to be shrouded in darkness now, but later you will understand why you need to remember them. Use your regrets and misfortunes as a guide for your future, one that will show you the difference between good times and the bad."

It was now that I realized how close we had become, our faces only inches apart. His emerald eyes seemed mesmerizing, enticing me into their depths. As I began to follow my desire, our lips becoming closer, an explosion occurred across the street, hurling both of us back into our world.

* * *

**End of Chapter Nine**


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